Woah, check it out.
Heh, yeah. Stupid dog.
Uh, I heard if you like, don't act scared, they won't attack you.
Heh, how do you do that?
[The dog leaps and bites Beavis' leg]
[talking to some other kids, referring to the dog bite]
“Rabies Scare” · Season 4, Episode 4
In this episode: Smart Butt-head (7), Smart Beavis (6), Coach Buzzcut (1)
Huh huh, you wanna touch his bone?
Yeah, heh, touch it.
KKid
Decent! Is it contagous?
No. I disinsfected it. [pours a sports drink onto the wound] Sports drinks have nutrients.
Listen up, morons. Some short-sighted federal appeals judge says I can't use this on you. [pats batton] But remember this: In this classroomm, I am the judge, the jury and the jailer!
[to Beavis] Does it hurt when I do this? [pokes the bite with the pointy end of a compass]
OOOOW!
Huh, that was cool.
Do you gentlemen have a problem? Do you wish to enlighten the class as to what is festering on your leg, Beavis?
Heh, dog bite.
Well. I thought you looked rabid, boy. Now listen close. Get the hell out of my classroom before you infect anyone else with your sickness! You stink of death! Butt-head! This man requires immediate medical attention!
...uh....
HOSPITAL, Butt-head! On the double!
Yessss!
HRHospital Receptionist
Can I help you?
Uh, he's got like, rabies or something.
HRHospital Receptionist
I see. What's your name?
Uh, last name is 'Munch'. First name is 'Rodney'.
Yeah, heh heh, yeah. Rod Munch.
DDoctor
So Rod, I understand you got bit by a dog. Well, don't be scared, cause look: a dog bit my thumb off once too, Rod. [does trick that makes it look like he's taking his thumb off]
Uh huh huh. You're stupid.
Heh, yeah.
DDoctor
Now Rod, I don't suppose you brought the animal with you?
Uh, no. He wasn't like, very friendly.
Yeah, heh, he doesn't like me.
DDoctor
Well, we'll have to find him anyway. In a suspected case of rabies, the animal has to be destroyed, of course. And to check for presence of the disease, he cut off the head and disect the brain.
Woah. That's cool.
DDoctor
Actually, yes. It is kind of cool.
Yeah, yeah, yeah! Come on, Butt-head, let's go find that dog.
DDoctor
Not so fast, Rod. Let's talk about your symptoms first. Any dizziness? Nausea? Fever? Any convulsions?
Yeah. Heh, uh, no more than usual though.
DDoctor
Hmm, so far nothing checks out. Maybe you were lucky.
Uh, you mean like, no decrapitation?
I've got it, I've got rabies!
DDoctor
...okay. I'll call the police and let them know about the dog. But first, we better start treatment.
Does he have to get a shot?
DDoctor
No.
Cool.
DDoctor
You have to get 18 of them, Rod.
Yes!
DDoctor
In the stomach.
Cool!
....this sucks.
TTV
The good news about rabies is that treating it no longer means a series of painful injections into the solar plexus. New vaccines require only 5 simple shots in the arm.
Hey Beavis. How come that stupid doctor didn't know that?
Maybe he doesn't watch TV.
[switch to the Doctor, who is in a dark room wielding a needle]
DDoctor
Hahahaha! Rod Munch, huh? HAHAHAHA!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Beavis and Butt-Head pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.