The Penguin quotes from Batman

Penguin

[to his election crew] Plenty of girls and bands and slogans and lots of hoopla, but remember, no politics. Issues confuse people!

Penguin

That Batman won't garner enough votes to become elected dogcatcher!

Penguin

Well, the costumed crooks! The dressed-up desperadoes!

Batman

Your super-brain power has driven us MAD, Penguin!

Robin

Something SNAPPED!

Batman

We don't care if we go up the river for a hundred years, we're getting you first!!

Penguin

Quick, my finks! Self-defense! The dynamic duo has flipped their wings!

Penguin

Back from the grave, you tricksters, eh?!

Robin

Back to send you on a honeymoon cruise, Penguin...up the river to the pen!

Batman

"Gone straight", huh?!

Robin

We'll straighten YOU out!!

Joker

Oh, The caped crusaders don't know what's in store for them. At long last, I'll have them out of my way permanently.

That's a long time, Joker.

Joker

The proceeds from my zodiac crimes will give me what I've always wanted. Complete control of Gotham City. Oh, yes. The caped crusaders are now solidly star-crossed. Venus. Venus, will you stop bouncing?

Your orders, Joker. A larcenous mind in a limber body. we must stay trim.

Joker

No.

Batman's no fool.

Joker

He's no match for me with the stars as my guide. Oh, get the door, Mercury.

Freight shipment. Collect. Two thousand four hundred fifty dollars.

What?

Joker

Just pay him, Mercury. Quick, give me a hand with this. Ha-ha-ha! Careful now. Careful.

What's inside, Joker? $2000 is a lot of money!

Joker

Ah, this merchandise is WORTH $2000!

Penguin

It's worth $200,000, you cheapskate! At least you could have sent me a plane ticket!

Joker

We had to get you into Gotham City without anyone knowing about it, Pengy. Especially Batman.

Penguin

You better have something good cooked up for that caped creep.

Joker

Oh, don't you worry, Pengy. The pot's being put on the fire right now, and Batman's in it.

Penguin

Oh, you are a man after my own heart, Joker.

Joker

Black, eh?

Penguin

Black as pitch.

Joker

Where are Uranus and Mars? They should have completed Operation Laundry Bag by now.

Maybe they ran into some trouble with the prison guards.

Joker

They better not. Operation Laundry Bag must be successful... in order for me to complete Aquarius and Capricorn. The final two crimes of my zodiac. Ha, ha. They're here. Yeah. Well, where is he?

In the bag.

Joker

Stupid. Why didn't you let him out?

We didn't have a chance. Warden Crichton's boys chased us all the way from the prison.

Joker

Well, quick, help me get him out.

Penguin

Waugh, waugh, waugh. You dolts. You buffoons. I might have suffocated.

I'm sorry, Pengy. I didn't mean to...

Penguin

"Pengy"? Mr. Penguin to you, sir.

Joker

Numskull, get Penguin's clothes for him! Hurry!

Penguin

Get my clothes for me? I've got them on!

Joker

Oh, so you do! For a minute, I thought those were prison issue!

Penguin

Prison issue?! This sartorial triumph, a prison issue?!

Joker

Well, sometime I'll give you the name of my tailor!

Penguin

Sometime I'll give you a piece of my mind! Like right now!!

I don't have any other clothes for him, Joker. But... But I got news for you. Saturn called from the other hideout. Venus and the Caped Crusaders are gone.

Joker

Well, of course they're gone. The clam made a good meal out of them. Ha-ha-ha!

The Batmobile's gone too, from outside. The clam could haven't eaten that.

Joker

Are you trying to tell me Batman, Robin and Venus could all have escaped my clam trap?

Yeah, that's the way it looks from here, Joker.

Joker

Oh, Pengy. Then I really need your help.

Penguin

To do what?

Joker

To terminate Batman once and for all. While I conclude my Zodiac Crimes.

Penguin

Now you're talking. Together to the end, Jokey. Batman's end.

Penguin

I don't know whether to call him "daddy" or just Commissioner.

Batman

If I were you, Penguin, I'd call help right now!

Robin

When we get through with you, Penguin, you'll be hollering "uncle" instead of "daddy"!

Penguin

You used a foul trick to murder those innocent fruit flies!

Batman

You murdered them, Penguin...when you let them out!

Chief O'Hara

You won't be needin' a watch where you're going!

Penguin

Wha???

Chief O'Hara

You'll need a calendar - a 20-year calendar!

Penguin

This is impossible! You're all infected with Lygerian Sleeping Sickness!

Oh, you see that's what happens, Pengy-poo, when you're sending off *flies* to do a *man's* job!

Robin

That's right, Pengy-poo! We're just sleepwalking!

Batgirl

What do you say to a little sleep-fighting, Robin?

Robin

Huh! Good idea, Batgirl!