The Riddler quotes from Batman

Riddler

Did you hear about Greta Garbo? She dreamed one night she sprinkled 6 boxes of grass seed in her hair, and woke up moaning: "I vant to be a lawn!"

Riddler

So many people have tried...The Penguin, Mr. Freeze, The Joker, all masters of their craft, granted, but I, only I have succeeded in ridding Gotham's criminal kingdom of The Dynamic Duo!

Riddler

[holding up Van Jones] Mr. Van Jones, why are you like a clock at midnight? Answer: because both your hands are goin' straight up right now!

Riddler

How can you LAMEBRAINS play CARDS at a time like this?!!!

Gee, I've never met royalty before! It's pretty thrilling!

Riddler

Royalty? You've never met royalty? And just whom do you think stands before you, my cherub? I am The Prince Of Puzzlers, The Count Of Conundrums, The King Of Crime! I hold court here, no one else!!!

Riddler

Rats, I am a man of a few words, but a man of many Riddles, so riddle me this: what is it that is always coming, but never arrives?! [No one answers] Quickly, quickly!

Uh, we ain't tuned in on the Riddle bit, chief!

Yeah! We give up! What is it that is always coming, but never arrives?

Riddler

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow?

Riddler

Tomorrow. For when it arrives, it is today, and today, my dear rodents, should prove to be most memorable!

Robin

Why did you steal that book on the lost treasure of the Incas?

Riddler

For two people about to become human candles, you ask a lot of questions!

Batman

I'm always interested in the way of the criminal mind.

[after successfully robbing a flooded band and escaping the dynamic duo] Worked like a charm, Riddler!

Riddler

Why not? There's a difference between a batman and a frogman!! One quick stop and then lets go dry our money!!!

Batgirl

What's up your sleeve this time?

Riddler

Up my sleeve, Batgirl? Riddle me once: what's most alluring when it's highest or lowest; when it's in the air or in a hole; when it's served you, yet you can't touch it? An enchanting ace!

Riddler

Riddle me this, Batman: what are the chilliest 12 inches in the world?

Batman

Cold feet!

Riddler

Excellent! What suite of cards lays eggs?

Batman

One that's chicken-hearted. Now listen to this, Riddler, sticks and stones may break my bones...

Riddler

Now you listen to me, Batman! My line is plugged into radio station GTZR! That means that all of Gotham City...[giggles]...has heard you called...[giggles]...a coward! [giggles full time]