Batman quotes

Commissioner Gordon

I don't know who he is beneath that mask of his, but I know when we need him, and we need him now!

Robin

Gosh, if I could just figure out that riddle. Why can't I get it?

Batman

Maybe your mind's on that cute little teenager who waved to you on the way across town, eh?

Robin

Awww, come on, Batman.

Riddler

Did you hear about Greta Garbo? She dreamed one night she sprinkled 6 boxes of grass seed in her hair, and woke up moaning: "I vant to be a lawn!"

Batman

The joke's on you, Riddler!

Robin

When is a donkey spelled with 1 letter?! When it's "U"!

Dick

Oh, heck! What's the use of learning French anyway?

Bruce

Dick, I'm surprised at you! Language is the key to world peace. If we all spoke each other's tongues, perhaps the scourge of war would be ended forever.

Dick

Gosh, Bruce, yes. I'll get these darn verbs if they kill me!

Robin

What do we do, tip off Commissioner Gordon?

Batman

No, not on your life, old man. The Penguin and I have a score to settle.

I'm not a person! I'm just a commodity!

Oh, Alfred! [She faints upon seeing Alfred and the movie star unconscious.]

Dick Grayson

What's so important about Chopin?

Bruce Wayne

All music is important, Dick. It's the universal language. One of our best hopes for the eventual realization of the brotherhood of man.

Dick Grayson

Gosh Bruce, yes, you're right. I'll practice harder from now on.

The Joker

[laughing] And now people of Gotham City, the moment you have all been waiting for. [Continuously Laughing] The grand finale! The climax of my performance! The zenith of my career! The unmasking of Batman and Robin the Boy Wonder!

Robin

All the same! "The Joker is wild!" "Batman and Robin foiled again!" Holy Headlines, do we look like page one dumbbells!

Batman

Too true, Robin. The responsibility of the press is to report the truth, despite what it might do to our public image. Our main concern is to a frightened public, whom we seem to be failing.

Robin

Gosh, you're right. I can't help thinking of only myself. I'm sorry.

Batman

Well, that's okay, chum. We all have the right to be selfish sometimes.