[Dismissively] Metric. Who uses metric?
Every single country on the planet except for us, Liberia, and Burma.
Wow, really? 'Cause you never think of those other two as having their shit together.
“Archer Vice: House Call” · Season 5, Episode 4
In this episode: Malory Archer (4), Lana Kane (2), Pam Poovey (1), Cheryl Tunt (1), Cyril Figgis (1), Ron (1)
Next time, remind me to get shot in the head.
Ron, next time, get shot in the head.
What are you eating?
Yogurt.
[snatching spoon] Give me that! Lick it.
Well, can't unhear that. [Takes lick from spoon] Holy shit, yogurt is amazing! Why have I never tried yogurt?
How have you never tried yogurt?
Mmm, I didn't know it was that good.
It's good because it's cocaine!
Oh, my God, and little kids eat it?
[as Pam carries her off] This is only somewhat like that old Gypsy woman said!
How do you not know the different kinds of porn?
Because I have sex with actual women, Cyril! My girlfriend's not equal parts the Internet, a tube of Kentucky jelly, self-loathing, and a sock.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Archer pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.