[to Hayley] Oh, excuse me. Are you an ethicist? Are you? Is there an ethicist in the house?
BHBlack-haired woman
I'm a ethicist.
Well, screw you! I'm Kevin Bacon!
“Four Little Words” · Season 2, Episode 15
In this episode: Francine Smith (3), Roger (2), Steve Smith (2), Stan Smith (1), Hayley Smith (1)
Geez, Roger, you're making Kevin Bacon look like a total douche.
Yeah, you may be beautiful on the outside like Kevin Bacon, but you're ugly on the inside like Tommy Lee Jones... on the outside... and the inside.
MMelinda
Oh, God, Francine, please tell me this is my blind date's dad!
(teaching Indian children) Okay, children, pay attention, because you need to learn English to survive. Repeat after me: "Thank you for calling Apple Tech Support."
ICIndian Children
(in unison): Thank you for call Apple Tech Support.
(A bloodcurdling human scream is heard from off camera)
There's the bell. I'll see all of you who don't die of cholera tomorrow at 8:00.
(A sickly-looking wolf effortlessly grabs one of the Indian boys and drags him off)
What about Sanjen? I can't have an Indian baby! I don't even like Indian food!
Francine [to Stan]: You bastard! (punches Stan in the face, knocking the clothes pin off his nose)
(sniffing) Ugh! Oh God, it's like being in a sauna with Michael Chiklis!
You made me think I was a murderer?! Do you have any idea what a nightmare you put me through?! I prayed to a freaking elephant! How am I gonna explain THAT to Jesus?!
(whispering about the young child on the swing set) There he is!
That little feelings-hurter is about to eat crow! I'm going to rub his nose in my nose!
YCYoung Child
Mommy, look! It's the monster! (Roger gasps) The monster from the hit movie, Hollow Man!
YCYoung Child's Mother
Oh my god! It IS Kevin Bacon! Normally I'd chastise you for watching an R-rated movie, but Kevin Bacon is an American treasure! Even when he's playing an invisible rapist!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's American Dad! pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.