[to evil Barry] Sure, you can kill me with your gun, but are you willing to try something much more elaborate and unnecessary?
“With Friends Like Steve's” · Season 1, Episode 22
In this episode: Stan Smith (7), Barry (5), Steve Smith (4), Francine Smith (2), Roger (1), Hayley Smith (1)
Thanks for driving me home, Mr. Smith. We're going faster than people.
Quiet, fatty fat-fat fatty!
Hey, Steve. Somebody left this on your front porch. (gives Steve the doormat)
Great, it's the fat one.
That's a doormat, Barry.
Who's Matt Barry?
God, I hate you so much!
Mom, can Barry stay for dinner?
If it's okay with his parents.
Oh, they won't care. They never care.
Good people. My kind of people.
(Barry's watch beeps)
Oh, time to take my vitamin. May I have a glass of water?
Fatty can use the garden hose!
(to Stan) Are you still moping about Steve? Come on. He's just going through a phase. It's like Steve is America and you're Arrested Development. It doesn't mean you're bad, it just means he's not interested in you.
Steve, do you still want to go to the Franklin Mint this weekend? The new Clara Peller commemorative plates are in. "Where's the beef?" (Laughs) Good question. Where was that beef? Nobody knew.
Oh, my God! The Franklin Mint?! Yeah, I'd rather die.
Steve used to really look up to me, but now it's like he's not into me anymore.
Wow, that's really, really boring.
I'm serious, Roger. I'm opening up to you here. It's like my son's rejection is bringing up all kinds of feelings I don't understand.
Oh, okay. Uh... not sure what to say here.
Well, I'm off to petition my college for an Eskimo studies program.
What?! They don't have one? I'm sorry, Stan, I'd love to help you, but the Eskimos, their plight, that's the real stuff here.
You care about the Eskimos?
Yeah, yeah, I love their pies. Keep going. Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk.
(to Barry) Hey, that's my dad's Tara Reid collector's plate. You can't touch that. You know how much that'll be worth in a few months when she's dead?
(about Barry) Careful, Steve! He's as mad as he is fat.
So, Barry, want to wind down by watching the best movie ever, Red Dawn?
I'm Barry!
Man, I'm getting hungry. Hey, let's go dig up your mother so she can make us breakfast!
Yes, Francine's first on my list. My list to kill! My name is Barry.
Stan, can we stop by church on the way to breakfast? Before I take my first sip of O.J., I like to take a big gulp of Jesus.
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