Dil quotes from All Grown Up!

Dil

Sorry I'm late, but I have exciting news. I just motivated a withering rose to bloom, yeah! It took a few hours and some sunlight and some water, but I did it. And I came up with a great motivational slogan: "Don't Get Down, Get Up"

Dil

(talking about the robbers) Those guys could be mutant androids that spit acid out of their eyes! (everyone stares at Dil blankly) That's it. No more PG-13 movies movie for me. I'm going back to epic romances.

I've been observing you, Pickles, and I must say I find your behavior disturbing.

Dil

Tell me more.

This past week I've noticed you eating exclusively green foods, hopping to class on one foot, and wearing your clothes inside out. What does that tell you, son?

Dil

That you have a lot of free time on your hands?

(growls) This is a standard psychological Rorschach test: I show you an inkblot; you tell me what you see. (Holds up an inkblot)

Dil

A Rorschach test.

Dil

Uh, a medieval castle, hundreds of angry villagers, a raging moat, a fire-breathing dragon, and a honey-baked ham.

Let's try a word-association experiment: I'll say a word; you respond with the first thing that comes to mind. Hot.

Dil

Hot.

Cold.

Dil

Cold.

Stop it.

Dil

Stop it.

You're supposed to give me a new word, not the same one I gave you!

Dil

You asked me to say the first word that came to mind. And when you say "hot," the first word I think of is, well... "hot."

(growls) Get out! No session tomorrow. Instead, I want to see the people responsible for your existence. (rips his suit at the back)

Dil

(tries to open the door) It's stuck.

(kicks the door down) Now it's not.

Dil

I didn't do nothin', I swear.

Okay, I'll bite. If you didn't take those things, then who did?

Dil

(looks at Tommy) I'm taking the Fifth.

(to Chaz) Figures, he already took everything else.

Tommy

(to Dil): And who said you won't be famous, too?

Dil

Three words: Lars Christian Anderson.

Tommy

Who's that?

Dil

Exactly.

Dil

(sees Bean in an old picture) No way.

Tommy

What is it, Dil? What's wrong?

Dil

It's the picture of the Everwood Settlers.

Tommy

So?

Dil

Back row, 3rd guy from the left.

Tommy

It's Bean!

Bean's a ghost?

(scream in fear)

Charlotte

Wasn't he... with you?

He's gone!

Dil

Now that the mystery's solved, the brain sucking Pioneers can finally rest in peace.

Great! Now let's get outta here!

Chuckie

Follow the buddies!

Tommy

Dil, what are you?!

Dil

Tommy, you've got to break away, you're turning Blek-anise, I really think so, and that's not who u are, you're a filmmaker, not a bleckie!

(to Tommy and Dil) Call me crazy, but that kid looks kind of familiar!

Tommy

Maybe 'cause he sits next to you in every single one of your classes now, he's new!

Dil

Or 'cause he's rolled by 26 times in the past 10 minutes?! Twenty-seven!

Chuckie

See? Friends are like holidays: you can never have enough of them.

Dil

Deep. You make that up?

Chuckie

Nope. I got it off a greeting card.

Chuckie

Uh, a little advice, Dil, having an imaginary friend after a certain age is something one should keep to one's self.

Dil

I'm down with that, Safety Boy. I put the "imaginary friend" thing to bed when I was eight. Izzy's my imaginary alien friend.

Didi

So, you two have to pick up Grandpa Boris from the optometrist.

Dil

Nooooooooooooooooo!

Dil

You know, we could still go.

Tommy

How?

Dil

He can't see. We'll park him somewhere, and tell him he's at the...senior center.

Tommy

Dil, if mom and dad found out, we'd be toast! Actually, we'd be lucky to be toast. We'd be the bird stuff that we scrape off the toast.

Dil

Bro'! They won't find out. As soon as we're there, we'll hit Whiplash Gorge — in and out thirty minutes.

Tommy

Oh, I don't know.

Dil

Technically, they didn't say we couldn't go to Slosh Mountain. They said we had to pick up grandpa. Who says we can't do both?

Tommy

It would be a shame to waste the tickets.

Dil

Now you're talkin', T'! And just think of poor grandpa, stuck in that stuffy house all day with his broken eyes.

Dil

Well, here we are, grandpa. Good ol' senior center.

Why did you bring me here? I hate this place!

Tommy

You love the senior center. All your friends are here!

What friends?! Harry? All he talks about are his golf stones. Ira, that guy owes me ten bucks! Anyway, are you sure this is the senior center? It doesn't sound like it, (sniffs) or smell like it.

Tommy

Well, uh, that's because it's Deep-fried Chocolate Bar Tuesday!

Tommy

Just you know, if we never find him, this is all on you!

Dil

I think we're looking at this the wrong way. Maybe grandpas are like chickens! Some prefer the comfort and security of the hen-house, while others want to roam on the free range!

Tommy

(exasperated) Do you even believe half the stuff that comes out of your mouth?