Pangborn quotes from All Grown Up!

By accidentally erasing my digital organizer, they've given me back my life! Pangborn is reborn! (laughs) I even picked out my socks this morning.

(To soccer team) And just because we've lost every single game... ever... doesn't mean that today we can't lose by a little bit less.

(To soccer team) Time to work on penalty shots, people! (Softly) 'Cause heaven knows you need it.

Finster, what are you doing?

Chuckie

Drowning, sir?

I've been observing you, Pickles, and I must say I find your behavior disturbing.

Dil

Tell me more.

This past week I've noticed you eating exclusively green foods, hopping to class on one foot, and wearing your clothes inside out. What does that tell you, son?

Dil

That you have a lot of free time on your hands?

(growls) This is a standard psychological Rorschach test: I show you an inkblot; you tell me what you see. (Holds up an inkblot)

Dil

A Rorschach test.

Dil

Uh, a medieval castle, hundreds of angry villagers, a raging moat, a fire-breathing dragon, and a honey-baked ham.

Let's try a word-association experiment: I'll say a word; you respond with the first thing that comes to mind. Hot.

Dil

Hot.

Cold.

Dil

Cold.

Stop it.

Dil

Stop it.

You're supposed to give me a new word, not the same one I gave you!

Dil

You asked me to say the first word that came to mind. And when you say "hot," the first word I think of is, well... "hot."

(growls) Get out! No session tomorrow. Instead, I want to see the people responsible for your existence. (rips his suit at the back)

Dil

(tries to open the door) It's stuck.

(kicks the door down) Now it's not.

Now, where was I?

Tommy

(imitating Pangborn's voice) Look Pickles, I'll let it slide this time.

Nice try. I— (device beeps, Pangborn tries to turn it off)

Chuckie

Sir, is that one of those overhyped, overpriced, cutting edge digital organizers?

No, it's an overhyped, overpriced, cutting edge digital organizer that saved my life! True, I was a little worried about compressing my entire existence into something the size of a waffle. My effiency variable has increased by 43%.

Chuckie

I guess that's important, huh?

Important! Not only is all my personal information at my fingertips, but it tells me what kind of coffee to order, what to wear, when to go to the dentist!

Tommy

Huh. Sounds like you just need my mom.

And it'll tell me what kind of punishment you deserve!

I put the misuse of pudding, then Pickles and Finster, hit this little button here, and...voila! (digital organizer beeps and presents punishment) You must water my plants for a week?

Who's Elmira?

(pets his hanging plant) Her leafy tendrils brush my... (meanwhile, Stu, Didi, and Chaz usher Tommy and Chuckie out of Pangborn's office)