Zack quotes from Accidentally on Purpose

Zack

[ponders for a second] Is that a real question?

Zack

No. That's what's so great about it. She thinks it is cool I am sticking around. So, thanks to you, I am like a hero. [leaves the kitchen]

Zack

I should be more careful who I bring into this house. I mean, we are going to have a baby here. I mean, I gotta start being more choosy.

Zack

Well, now I know how you felt. Except that when I met you, she wasn't pregnant with your baby. So, it's kind of worse for me.

Zack

I have to live with her.

Zack

I have to listen to her make out with Brian in the other room.

Zack

You should see this list of baby essentials. When all is said and done, that single orgasm is going to cost me four hundred and fifty thousand dollars.

Zack

Yeah, perfect.

Zack

What was that name you said the other day?

Zack

Yeah, I really like that.

Zack

Uh yeah, but because of our work schedules, I can only go during the day and she can go only at night.

Zack

I am really looking forward to it. I mean, no other guys I hang with are having a baby, and, you know, I am hoping to meet some other dads. Maybe hang out.

Zack

And you are interrupting her. So, boobs, go on.

Zack

You know, I was kind of hoping to bond with some of the cool guys in the class, but they totally shut me off of their chunky dad clique. I don't think they were thrilled with how much hair I have or the ease with which I can get an erection.

Zack

Do it in the sink.