YuYu Hakusho quotes

And so it all begins. This boy's name is Yusuke. He's 14 years old and is supposed to be the hero of the story...but oddly enough, he's dead.

Well, that wasn't normal. Okay Yusuke, just think; it's not like this is the first time you've been in a jam. Today did start off different. I went to school...

Hey, nice skirt.

Keiko

All the girls have to wear these. [Yusuke throws a piece of gum up to catch it in his mouth, but Keiko catches it] Just like all the boys have to wear blue jumpsuits, which I notice you're not.

Oh gimme a break Keiko; I look better in green.

Keiko

Maybe I'd be more tolerant, Yusuke, if I could see you in school more than once every ten days! You give our class a horrible attendance average, which gets me in trouble as a class representative, and plus you won't even be able to graduate middle school! Sometimes I think you don't care about anyone but yourself, and then you don't even do that right. You hear me?

Nice uniform. It's lacy.

Keiko

[yelling] Yusuke, you perv! People like you should be strung up in the street! Dumb boy! Hasn't grown up a bit since he was 4 years old!

Aren't you just terrified of what he might do to you? Or even worse, what people might say of it?

Keiko

Not really. He just wants you to think he's dangerous. On the inside he's more like a lamb.

Yeah, but you haven't heard the latest news about him, Keiko. He's super tough, and he kills for fun!

Yeah, and if you cross him, he'll whistle for 2,000 bad guys...with guns!

Keiko

C'mon, Yusuke doesn't even know how to whistle.

What?

Keiko

Besides, Yusuke couldn't order around two people, let alone 2,000. He doesn't have many friends.

Not what I heard.

Yeah, I think we would know.

It figures that the one day I feel like going to school everyone wants to push on me and give me their stupid lectures! I hate that school. I hate this town! [walks into his apartment and sees his mother, smoking in her pajamas] Oh great, Mother of the Year.

Get me coffee.

Hey Kuwabara, you're conscious. I'm not used to that!

That was a cheap shot last time and I was only knocked out for a little bit, okay? Now I'm back and I'm gonna beat your face up so bad even kittens won't look at you!

Plus, if you were a real messenger of death, you'd take this more seriously. Like, how grim can you be when you say 'bingo?' You're supposed to wear a big black robe and look like a skeleton!

Botan

Now I understand what kind of person you are; it's in my guidebook! Rather than be scared or surprised, you yell a lot and tell me I don't know what I'm talking about.

Botan

It's funny, Yusuke...none of us were expecting you to die today; you've thrown us all for a loop. Run someone with your credentials through that scenario a thousand times and they never would've saved a kid like that. No one saw it coming and quite frankly, we haven't prepared a place for you yet.

Oh, gimme a freakin' break! Are you telling me you guys were expecting that little boy to die?

Botan

Well, I wasn't going to tell you this because I knew it would make you even more irritable, but without the confusion caused by you running into the street, that boy would've actually missed the car and escaped with one less scrape on his right shoulder.

What? But he was headed right for him!

Botan

Yes...well, the driver would have veered to the left. In other words, your death was a complete and utter waste!

[attending his own wake] Whoa, all my classmates are here. Just like I thought, look at 'em laughing! They probably just came over here 'cause they were getting extra credit!

Come on, let's go back! This isn't right!

Shut up! Let go of me, wouldja?

What? Kuwabara?!

[entering Yusuke's apartment while being restrained by his friends and screaming at his picture]Damn you! You think you can just back out 'cause you're scared!

Kuwabara, this place is for mourning!

I'm not gonna leave! Not until he comes out here and lets me fight him!

He can't do that!

I'm gonna beat you down, you punk! You hear me? [his voice breaks as he tries to hit the picture] Who do you think you are, huh? Dirty punk! Who am I gonna fight now? Who am I gonna fight?

He's gone!

No! [throws a punch at the picture, but stops inches before he hits it, sobbing] You're supposed to be here...for me.

At first I was so surprised, Yusuke...to hear you'd saved a kid at the cost of your own life. You've always acted more selfishly than that. Darn. Yusuke, I don't know why I don't feel like speaking well of you. [begins to cry] Why didn't you stay? You could have made something great out of yourself!

Mommy, do you think it'd be okay if I played with that boy tomorrow, if I'm good?

No, son.

I know some people sounded angry at him, but he's really nice. He made really funny faces at me too, and he got me my ball! I don't know why those people were crying like that. It was probably because they wanted to play with him, too.

Botan

This is Yusuke Urameshi, and he's honored to meet you.

Koenma

Mm-hmm.

Botan

[hitting Yusuke] Hey, are you trying to make me look stupid? Tell him how honored you are!

[laughing] That's a good one, Botan, but let's be serious, okay?

Botan

Why would I lie about something like this, you moron?

[still laughing, pointing at Koenma] Why would the Spirit World be run by a toddler?

Botan

[slapping Yusuke's hand] Don't point your finger at him!

And to think I was scared of the mighty King Yama!

Koenma

[clearing his throat] Well to be more exact, I am the mighty Koenma, and I am the son of King Yama. Even though I appear to be a child, I have been around over fifty times longer than you have, so watch your mouth when you speak to me.

So it takes hundreds of years to move past a diaper?

Botan

[punching Yusuke in the head] Can't you show an ounce of decency?!

Koenma

Actually, I'm proud to say that in addition to knowing the greatest secrets of the universe, I am also quite potty-trained.

Koenma

[presenting a golden egg] Yusuke Urameshi, I present you...your ordeal.

My ordeal is a golden chicken egg?

Koenma

Your ordeal will be what is inside of it, and I assure you, it won't be a chicken. Hatch this egg, and face what comes out.

So what's the trick? Do I do something to hatch it?

Koenma

No, no, not at all. You only have to keep it with you. This is a Spirit Beast, and it feeds off the energy emitted from your soul. This will be a true and constant test of your character. The things you do and feel will change the monster inside for better...or for worse. If, as would be expected from your files, your spirit is wicked and cruel, then the beast that hatches will be the same way. It will devour you, and you'll be lost forever. This, as you might imagine, is a very painful experience. However, if the energy you emit is good and true, then so will be the Spirit Beast. It will take care of you and guide you back into your living body. Of course, if it sounds too risky, you can opt out and remain as a ghost. The choice, Yusuke Urameshi, is yours.

Keiko

[dreaming that Yusuke's leaving and she's running to catch up with him] Yusuke! Yusuke, wait!

Keiko

Wait. Yusuke, wait.

[his ghost sitting on Keiko's chest] Listen to me, Keiko. I need you to pull yourself together. I'm coming back! It's hard to explain, but I'm a ghost right now and I have to take care of this egg, and then I--

Keiko

[mumbling] Yusuke...

Hey, are you hearing me? This is important!

Keiko

You're heavy.

[in Keiko's dream] I need you to take care of my body until I come back. You've got to tell them not to cremate me. And tell my mom not to waste her life away because we're gonna be fine!

Keiko

[nods, teary-eyed] Mm-hmm.

Well...I guess that's it, Keiko. I'm coming back. [wipes tears off of Keiko's cheek] I don't wanna see you crying anymore.

Keiko

[waking up] Oh, Yusuke! [realizes he's not there] But he was...I thought...was all that really just a dream?

Keiko

No...I'm sure I felt him.