Young Dracula · Season 1
(After Vlad describes his Grandparents' strictness in upholding vampire tradition.)
If they knew what my life was like here...
They'd kill you?
Well... no. They'd send me back to Transylvania. To a vampire boarding school. No friends, no family, no daylight ever again. I'd spend the rest of eternity lurking around in the shadows. Can you imagine anything worse?
[Awed] Wicked!
[When the Count plans to marry Mrs Branagh.]
[to Ingrid and Chloe] I've just had a thought, if we can't stop this marriage you two will be step sisters.
[Ingrid looks horrified.]
Eurgh! I'd rather be undead!
I wish Dad would shut the crypt door when he's punishing Renfield. You can hear the screams all over the castle.
[Ingrid gestures to the jar of cockroaches.]
You put the cockroaches in the study! You cunning, devious... I'm impressed.
Needs must. There was no way I was having a Breather for a stepmother.
Bit rough on Renfield though... getting all the blame.
Yeah.
[Slight pause before the two burst out laughing.]
[When Vlad makes the rugby team.]
My noble son has finally brought glory to the family name.
Except he didn't use deceit... or break a single rule...
Ingrid!
Or cheat!
[shocked] Vladimir, is this true?
[While watching Vlad during the rugby tryouts.]
That's it, Vlad! Tackle him! Tackle him! Yeees! Oh, ok, no! Well, get up then! What's wrong with you?! It's only a knee you've got another one!
[Chloe gives him a look.]
What?
Robin, I'm so proud of you. Who'd have thought it? Gloom-cookey Robin is a real Branagh after all.
Fighting doesn't prove anything!
Of course it does, it proves who's best at fighting!
Dad, you're not really gonna fight a vam... a vastly superior fighter like the Count?
Don't be so surprised, when I was in the cub scouts I came second in the Boxing Championship.
Mum said you lost to a girl.
Brownies can be vicious.
Zoltan, I need your advice. I've got this problem.
Bathe it in warm water and keep it bandaged over night. That works for me.
Err... no. I mean, should you do what's best for yourself or what's best for your friends?
Ah, most people would say you should put the well-being of others before your own. Look at me, I have never been selfish. And now... I'm stuffed, ignored, mounted on wheels.
Halloween affects Dad like a lit match in a fireworks factory.
Even a sausage through the heart wouldn't subdue him.
You mean a stake.
Oh, yes. You see the Count has banned me from using that word. That word and "bun fight".
[Vlad, Robin and Chloe ponder this for a moment.]
Sun light.
Mmm-hmm. "Bun fight" and "sausage".
Ok, first question. If Boris can turn into a wolf in 3 seconds and Inga can turn into a bat in 5 seconds, how long would it take Boris and Inga to storm a peasant dwelling and drink the blood of everyone in sight?
You wanted to see me?
Ah, Vladimir. I fear that you're not trying your best to pass this Blood Test. And I know that no son and heir of mine would fail something so straight forward, and if they did, well... they wouldn't be my son and heir for very long.
[disbelievingly] Are you saying you'd disown me... if I fail the test?!
No, of course not. I'd just deny all knowledge of your existence.
What a night I've had! Stop what you're doing and prepare to be amazed!
[He reaches into his cape and pulls out a rabbit.]
What... you got a job as a magician?
Oh, if you need an attractive assistant I look absolutely stunning in sequins.
No, you idiots! I've been out hunting!
You're leaving?
But you said you loved me.
You were dying... I was trying to be nice.
Slayers will always be our enemy. We shall bite them on the beaches, we shall bite them in the fields and in the streets! We shall bite them in the hills, we shall never surrender!
(When Robin goes to Van Helsing's trailer to find Vlad and Ingrid tied together as Van Helsing's hostages.)
What're you two doing here?
Having a sing along, what does it look like?!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Young Dracula pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
