Welcome Back, Kotter quotes
73 total quotesVinnie: You know, Mr. Kotter, prayer is good for you.
Kotter: Oh, I know that, Vinnie, I know. I prayed all morning, the whole time I was on the subway comin' to work. I prayed that we'd get to my stop before the two guys who were kickin' the conductor noticed me.
Kotter: Oh, I know that, Vinnie, I know. I prayed all morning, the whole time I was on the subway comin' to work. I prayed that we'd get to my stop before the two guys who were kickin' the conductor noticed me.
Epstein: Hey, look, we can't stay long, we got a cab waiting downstairs.
Kotter: You took a cab?
Epstein: We're gonna give it back.
Kotter: You stole a cab?
Vinnie: No, no, no, no. It's Horshack's father's cab. You can't steal a guy's father's cab. You can't.
Horshack: Then why'd we tie him up, Vinnie?
Kotter: You took a cab?
Epstein: We're gonna give it back.
Kotter: You stole a cab?
Vinnie: No, no, no, no. It's Horshack's father's cab. You can't steal a guy's father's cab. You can't.
Horshack: Then why'd we tie him up, Vinnie?
Epstein: How'd you figure it was Cavelli, pop?
Kotter: Ah, good question, number one son. Old Chinese proverb: Man who try to pull wool over eyes wind up with sheep on face.
Kotter: Ah, good question, number one son. Old Chinese proverb: Man who try to pull wool over eyes wind up with sheep on face.
Kotter: All right, Epstein, come on. Let's have it so we can get to work.
Epstein: What?
Kotter: One of your famous notes that'll read something like, 'Please excuse Juan for being late. He was kidnapped by the jet set and left tied up on a lawn in Hyannis Port.' Signed...
Sweathogs: Epstein's mother!
Epstein: What?
Kotter: One of your famous notes that'll read something like, 'Please excuse Juan for being late. He was kidnapped by the jet set and left tied up on a lawn in Hyannis Port.' Signed...
Sweathogs: Epstein's mother!
Bambi: Didn't we live together in another life?
Epstein: Oh...oh, I would have remembered that!
Bambi: [giggling] Oh, he's magic!
Kotter: Yeah, maybe one day he'll disappear.
Epstein: Oh...oh, I would have remembered that!
Bambi: [giggling] Oh, he's magic!
Kotter: Yeah, maybe one day he'll disappear.
Freddie: This coat was worn at the famous Lincoln-Douglas debate.
Kotter: This coat was worn at the famous Lincoln-Douglas debate?
Freddie: I wore this coat when my father, Lincoln, beat the daylights out of my brother, Douglas!
Kotter: This coat was worn at the famous Lincoln-Douglas debate?
Freddie: I wore this coat when my father, Lincoln, beat the daylights out of my brother, Douglas!
Carvelli: [about Kotter] Teacher? This is a tough school.
...
Carvelli: That's the oldest punk I ever saw.
Woodman: I'm not a punk; I'm the vice principal.
Carvelli: Vice principal? This is a tough school.
...
Carvelli: That's the oldest punk I ever saw.
Woodman: I'm not a punk; I'm the vice principal.
Carvelli: Vice principal? This is a tough school.
Epstein: [about spending so long in the bathroom] I'm just enjoying a few moments of privacy, you know? I mean, when you got nine brothers and sisters like I got, the only time you get to use the bathroom by yourself is on your birthday!
Epstein: Hey, I got an idea, listen to this. ISB.
Kotter: ISB?
Epstein: In-School Betting. Yeah. It's about time we get bettin' off the streets, into the school here, where it belongs! [Sweathogs cheer]
Kotter: Are you kiddin'? I'll lay you 5-2 that'll never happen.
Freddie: I'll take that bet.
Kotter: ISB?
Epstein: In-School Betting. Yeah. It's about time we get bettin' off the streets, into the school here, where it belongs! [Sweathogs cheer]
Kotter: Are you kiddin'? I'll lay you 5-2 that'll never happen.
Freddie: I'll take that bet.
Freddie: We're gonna take all this money, we're gonna put it in the bank. We're gonna all be typhoons.
Kotter: That's, uh, tycoons.
Freddie: No, typhoons. 'Cause at the end of the year, we gonna all blow it!
Kotter: That's, uh, tycoons.
Freddie: No, typhoons. 'Cause at the end of the year, we gonna all blow it!
Epstein: Miss Holzgang said we could draw our favorite thing, so I drew this bea-utiful girl! Oh!
Horshack: I drew a picture of a cheese Whopper.
Freddie: Yeah, and I drew a picture of Arnold getting heartburn.
Vinnie: And I drew a picture of me.
Horshack: I drew a picture of a cheese Whopper.
Freddie: Yeah, and I drew a picture of Arnold getting heartburn.
Vinnie: And I drew a picture of me.
Freddie: You're the leader of the Sweathogs, right?
Vinnie: Am I the leader of the Sweathogs? Is a bear Catholic? Does the Pope live in the woods?
Vinnie: Am I the leader of the Sweathogs? Is a bear Catholic? Does the Pope live in the woods?
Epstein: I ain't goin' to class, man. I ain't never goin' to class.
Kotter: Where you goin' then?
Epstein: I don't know, uh, into the religious life.
Kotter: Brother Epstein, huh? I can see the headlines: 'Puerto Rican Jew enters monastery, becomes the first 'Schlamonk.'
Kotter: Where you goin' then?
Epstein: I don't know, uh, into the religious life.
Kotter: Brother Epstein, huh? I can see the headlines: 'Puerto Rican Jew enters monastery, becomes the first 'Schlamonk.'
Freddie: [to Vinnie] You got as much chance being a priest as I do gettin' the lead in the school production of Snow White.
Epstein: Yeah, and Freddie was the best one who read for the part. But, me and Horshack, see, we're still up for dwarfs.
Horshack: Yeah. Guess who's gonna play Dopey?
Kotter: If I was casting, I'd have a rough time choosing.
Season 2
Epstein: Yeah, and Freddie was the best one who read for the part. But, me and Horshack, see, we're still up for dwarfs.
Horshack: Yeah. Guess who's gonna play Dopey?
Kotter: If I was casting, I'd have a rough time choosing.
Season 2
Freddie: [to Horshack] You know, I never really thought I would miss you, but you sort of grow on a guy... like mold.