When I brought him [Jake] home Sunday night and served him dinner, he tipped me with a $25 chip from Caesars Palace and told me I had a nice rack!
Uh, well, Judith... you do.
I'm warning you, Alan, things had better change around here or there will be serious consequences. Legal consequences! Got it?
Got it.
Good-bye. [leaves; Alan shuts the door]
Alan [mocking Judith]: "There will be serious consequences. Legal consequences."
Charlie [also mocking Judith]: "I don't care what you do during the week, but on the weekends, you're a role model."
Alan [same mocking voice]: I enjoy talking this way.
Charlie [same mocking voice]: As do I.
Have you seen my Game Boy?
NNorman
No. Have you seen my wife?
No. Well, if you see it, let me know.
NNorman
Ditto.
Charlie [to Norman]: I am-- I am, I am so sorry. I had no idea that she was married. Believe me, I have a firm rule when it comes to sleeping with married women.
Yeah, if she's firm enough, he'll do her.
Charlie [to Berta]: I'm sorry, isn't there something around here you could be cleaning?
I'm guessing you could use a good scrubbing.
Evelyn [to Norman]: Did my son... polish your trophy wife?
[to Berta] Charlie...
[interrupting Alan] Got it.
Get it? How can you get it?
Well, there's a Roles Royce in the drive way, [pull out silk leggings] and I found this hanging on the mailbox, so I'm guessing that your brother has some bimbo upstairs and Norman here is her daddy or her sugar daddy.
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