A character in Top Gear
Played by Jeremy Clarkson
Top Gear · 1,774 quotes
Most-quoted character in Top Gear: in 1,331 of its 1,774 quotes
Most scenes with: Richard Hammond (406), James May (323), Stephen Ladyman (5)
[About the Koenigsegg CCX]
JeremyOh. And I'll give you a little tip: If you tune this engine to run on environmentally-friendly biofuel, you'll be getting nine hundred brake horsepower. [laughs] Should I get Bill Oddie one of these?
JeremyThis is the Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that's much to shout about. That's like saying "Ooh good I've got syphilis, the BEST of the sexually transmitted diseases. [Drives past a sign welcoming him to "Piddington"] That says it all, really. "I drive a people carrier... I'm a bit of a Piddington"
[Whilst in the carwash in the Espace convertible]
JeremyI'm dry still.
[a moment later]
JeremyI'M WET NOW!!
JeremyYou need to be able to drive the car over a sleeping policeman... That wouldn't drive over Richard Hammond's girlfriend.
[During the opening sequence.]
JeremyTonight: I'm ruining the tranquillity of the Yorkshire Dales. Richard ruins Iceland. And we all ruin a local radio show.
[on the Stig]
JeremySome say he has a digital face, and that if he felt like it, he could fire Alan Sugar... all we know is, he's called the Stig.
Jeremy[Before the Stig's Liana lap] This week we've been literally inundated with a letter...
[on the new Jaguar XK, and why its front lifts above 130 mph]
JeremyGolf. In the boot, golfists want enough room to put their bats...
Jeremy[About a BMW 650 convertible] This doesn't have an engine. What it has instead is a nuclear bomb under the bonnet.
[after Richard loses the car vs. jet-powered kayak challenge]
JeremyVery important message there...somewhere. Anyway, it's time to move on...
[During the opening sequence.]
JeremyTonight: I get a hot head..."Oh-oh-oh, I'm on fire..."; Richard gets another Top Gear dog "Help!"; And James has some trouble with wind.
[on the Stig]
JeremySome say that his genitals are on upside down, and that if he could be bothered, he could crack the Da Vinci Code in 43 seconds... all we know is, he's called the Stig.
Jeremy[voiceover] Meanwhile, back at the convoy...
[Richard's campervan suddenly stalls at a road junction]
Jeremy[voiceover] ...and so in the spirit of Top Gear comradeship... we left James behind.
JeremyIt's the coldest March for twenty years, because of global warming.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Top Gear pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
