We'll call them Answer A and Answer B.
C.J. Mr. President does this mean you won't be seeking a second term? Answer A is 'You bet. I will absolutely be seeking a second term. I'm looking forward to the campaign. There is great work that is yet to be done.'
'Are you out of your mind? I can't possibly win re-election. I lied about a degenerative illness. I'm the target of a Grand Jury investigation and Congress is about to take me out to lunch. I'd sooner have my family take their clothes off and dance the Tarantella on the Truman Balcony than go through a campaign with this around my neck.' [pause] You think that's too on the nose?
[Bartlet stands alone in the Oval Office, in the middle of a raging storm. The back door suddenly flies open]
God damn it...Mrs. Landingham!
[Mrs. Landingham suddenly walks through the main door of the Oval Office]
I really wish you wouldn't shout, Mr. President.
[Bartlet stares at her for a few seconds]
The door keeps blowing open.
You could have used the intercom to call me, you know.
I know, but I didn't want to-
You didn't want to, or you didn't know how?
It's not that I don't know how. It's just that I haven't learned yet.
[Pause. Mrs. Landingham smiles at him]
BBartlett
I have MS, and I didn't tell anybody.
Yeah. So, you're having a little bit of a day.
BBartlett
You're going to make jokes?
God doesn't make cars crash and you know it. Stop using me as an excuse.
BBartlett
The Party's not going to want me to run.
The Party'll come back. You'll get them back.
BBartlett
I've got a secret for you, Mrs. Landingham, I've never been the most popular man in the Democratic Party.
I've got a secret for you, Mr. President. Your father was a prick who could never get over the fact that he wasn't as smart as his brothers. Are you in a tough spot? Yes. Do I feel sorry for you? I do not. Because there are people way worse off than you.
BBartlett
Give me numbers.
I don't know numbers. You give them to me.
BBartlett
How about a child born this minute has one in five chances of being born into poverty?
How many Americans don't have health insurance?
What's the number one cause of death for black men under 35?
How many Americans are behind bars?
How many Americans are drug addicts?
And one in five kids in poverty?
BBartlett
That's thirteen million American children. 3.5 million kids go to schools that are literally falling apart. We need 127 billion in school construction, and we need it today!
To say nothing of 53 people trapped in an embassy.
You know, if you don't want to run again, I respect that. [stands up] But if you don't run 'cause you think it's gonna be too hard or you think you're gonna lose - well, God, Jed, I don't even want to know you.
SSandy
Mr. President, can you tell us right now if you'll be seeking a second term?
I'm sorry, Sandy, there was a bit of noise there, could you repeat the question?
SSandy
Can you tell us right now if you'll be seeking a second term?
[Bartlet slides his hands off the podium, puts them in his pockets, looks away and smiles]
What's Islamic extremism? It's strict adherence to a particular interpretation of 7th century Islamic law as practiced by the prophet Mohammed, and when I say "strict adherence," I'm not kidding around. Men are forced to pray, wear their beards a certain length. Among my favorites is there's only one acceptable cheer at a soccer match: 'Allah-uh-Akbar.' "God is great." If your guys are getting creamed, then you're on your own. Things are a lot less comic for women, who aren't allowed to attend school or have jobs. They're not allowed to be unaccompanied, and oftentimes get publicly stoned to death for crimes like not wearing a veil. I don't have to tell you they don't need to shout at a soccer match because they're never going to go to one. So what bothers them about us? Well, the variety of cheers alone coming from the cheap seats at Giants stadium when they're playing the Cowboys is enough for a jihad, to say nothing of street corners lined church next to synagogue, next to mosque, newspapers that can print anything they want, women who can do anything they want including taking a rocket ship to outer space, vote, and play soccer. This is a plural society. That means we accept more than one idea. It offends them... You want to get these people? I mean, you really want to reach in and kill them where they live? Keep accepting more than one idea. It makes them absolutely crazy.
When you think of Afghanistan, think of Poland. When you think of the Taliban, think of the Nazis. When you think of the citizens of Afghanistan, think of the Jews in concentration camps. A friend of my dad's was at one of the camps. He used to come over to the house, and he and my dad used to shoot some pinochle. He said he once saw a guy at the camp kneeling and praying. He said, "What are you doing?" The guy said he was thanking God. And my dad's friend said, "What could you possibly be thanking God for?" He said, "I'm thanking God for not making me like them." Bad people can't be recognized on sight. There's no point in trying.
But listen, don't worry about all this right now. We got you covered. Worry about school. Worry about what you'll tell your parents when you break curfew. You're gonna meet guys. You're gonna meet girls. (Not so much you, Fred.) Learn things, be good to each other. Read the newspapers, go to the movies, go to a party, read a book. In the meantime, remember pluralism. You want to get these people? I mean, you really want to in and kill them where they live? Keep accepting more than one idea. Makes them absolutely crazy.
Today, the President is going to direct the Attorney General to appoint a Special Prosecutor.
Now, you know what that means, right?
Okay, so you'll need a lawyer.
Actually, Mr. Babish, I don't think I need one.
He's going to ask you about everything you'd seen and heard since you started working at the White House.
I can answer those questions truthfully.
Then he's going to call you back a month later and ask you the exact same questions. If your answers change even a little bit, he'll prosecute you for perjury.
Oliver's fine. Are you prepared to describe every conversation you've ever had with the President? Whether he asked you for an aspirin? Whether his hands quivered? Are you prepared to answer questions about your relationship with his youngest daughter? This is NFL football.
When is this all going to happen?
Because grand jury investigations are secret.
So they can just knock on my door one morning?
They will knock on your door one morning.
How much? You know, how much do you think...
Assuming you did nothing wrong, saw nothing wrong and heard nothing wrong - about a hundred thousand dollars.
