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The West Wing · Season 1

“In Excelsis Deo” quotes from The West Wing

8 quotes

“In Excelsis Deo” · Season 1

In this episode: Josh Lyman (4), Josiah Bartlet (2), Leo McGarry (2), Sam Seaborn (2), Toby Ziegler (1), C.J. Cregg (1), Charlie Young (1), Mrs. Landingham (1)

Apparently, I've arranged for an honor guard for somebody.

Yes, sir. I'm sorry.

No no. Just tell me, is there anything else I've arranged for? We're still in NATO right?

Yes, sir.

What's going on?

A homeless man died last night; a Korean War veteran, who was wearing a coat that I gave to the Goodwill. It had my card in it.

Toby, you're not responsible for ...

An hour and twenty minutes for the ambulance to get there. A Lance Corporal, United States Marine Corps, Second of the Seventh. The guy got better treatment at Panmunjom.

Toby, if we start pulling strings like this, you don't think every homeless veteran would come out of the woodworks?

I can only hope, sir.

LLaurie

I can't believe you. What, did you get this out of a book?

It was my idea.

LLaurie

Oh! What are you, the brains of the outfit?

Yeah, I am. And I got to tell you, I could care less about your indignation right now. A man has left himself open to the kind of attack from which men in my business do not recover. Now if our tactics seem less than civilized it's because so are our attackers. In any event, I don't feel like standing here taking a civics lesson from a hooker.

[Signing Christmas cards] Who the hell is this guy and why would I care if he has a merry Christmas?

Just sign the damn thing.

Here's one.

One what?

A book which if I was stuck with it on a desert island I still wouldn't read it. "The Adventures of James C. Adams, Mountaineer and Grizzly Bear Hunter of California." I believe I would eat this book before I read it.

An hour with you in a rare book store. Couldn't you just drop me off the top of the Washington Monument instead?

It's Christmas, Josh! No reason we can't do both.

What's your secret service code name?

They just changed them.

I know. What's yours?

Princeton.

Mine's Flamingo.

It's nice.

No. It's not nice.

Flamingo is a nice looking bird.

The flamingo is a ridiculous looking bird.

You're not ridiculous looking.

I know I'm not ridiculous looking.

Any way for me to get out of this conversation?

I'm gonna go talk to someone.

Excellent.

This place looks great doesn't it?

I've never seen a Christmas look like this, the trees, and the lights, and everybody singing.

The presents...

I brought it up because, I don't know, you seem a little down this week.

Yeah, I know Charlie. I tend to get a little down during the holidays.

You don't like Christmas?

I miss my boys.

I never knew you had kids.

Twins. Andrew and Simon. I tried not, you know, I dressed them differently, but they still did everything together. They went off to medical school together, and then they finished their second year at the same time, and of course their lottery number came up at the same time.

For the draft?

Well, I would have thought they could get a deferment to finish med school.

They didn't want one. Their father and I begged them, but they wanted to go where people needed doctors. Their father and I begged them, but you can't tell kids anything. So they joined up as medics and four months later they were pinned down during a fight in Da Nang and were killed by enemy fire. That was Christmas Eve 1970. [beat] You know, they were so young, Charlie, they were your age. It's hard when that happens so far away, you know because, with the noises and the shooting, they had to be so scared. It's hard not to think that right then they needed their mother... Anyway, I miss my boys.

You went and did it?

What?

Exactly what I asked you not to do.

Leo.

You went and saw Sam's friend?

How'd you know?

I had you tailed.

You had us tailed?

Yes.

Why did you have us tailed?

On the off chance that you're as stupid as you look. Whose idea was this?

It was mine. Sam was a reluctant accomplice. You had us tailed?

Get over it.

She didn't give us anything.

I should hope not.

Leo.

It's not what we do, Josh.

That may be true, but still...

It's not what we do.

Yes, sir.

You should apologize to that girl for even asking.

I did.

Then apologize again.

Yes, sir.

Like I'm not gonna have enough problems without the Keystone Cops.

We meant well.

Is that supposed to mean something to me?

No.

[beat] Well, it does.

I'm glad.

Go back to work.

It's Christmas Eve.

What, the country isn't open Christmas Eve?

Fair point.

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