[Flashback sequence of Chief Wiggum coming into the house.]
[to Homer] What's goin' on here, Simpson? Am I gonna need the zip strips?
Everything's fine, cupcakes and sprinkles.
Oh, really? Then how did you get that? [Points to Marge's black-eye. Speaks to Homer:] What gives, Simpson? Givin' your wife an Irish kiss?
[off-screen] No, I swear!
It was my fault, I..... I walked into a door.
Walked into a door? That is the lamest excuse I've ever... [Accidentally smacks into the door on his way out.] All right, door. You're comin' downtown. [Cuffs himself to the door.]
Anyone where your family is? Show me on Mapquest. [Santa's Little Helper snarls angrily with his own teeth.] Oh, fine! Google Maps.
[Homer is traveling through his mind with memory Bart and memory Lisa.]
I don't know if I should be showing this to you kids.
ML Memory Lisa
Relax, we're not really your kids. We're representations of them created in your mind.
Really? If I created all this, then that means I can have pizza whenever I want.
[Homer uses his mind to make a phone appear.]
[Picks up the phone.] Hello, I'd like an extra large pepperoni and mushrooms. [annoyed] 35 Minutes? [Homer angrily hangs up the phone.]
Dad, I can't remember what I did last night. Do have any idea?
You come to me for help rememberin'? That's like asking your horse to do your taxes -which I did in 1998.
[Shows photo of horse using an adding machine.]
[Just as Homer accidentally destroys his own kiss memory like we did in "The Way We Weren't"]
Dad, you just destroyed your first kiss!
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