The Raccoons Season 1 quotes

Sorry, this information is strictly confidential.

And this machine is for the birds!

Do you have an appointment sir?

One more oink out of you, pig, and you're a budget cut.

I ask Cedric to show a little drive and all of a sudden he's more meddlesome than a government accountant!

Bert

Boy, this metal detector works great! It's gonna make us a fortune! Doubloons, pieces of eight, maybe even pieces of nine!

Come on Knox! You wouldn't throw me out of my own house, would you?

Mr Knox

Heavens, no! I'd wait six hours, then throw you out of my house!

It's a good thing I don't crack under pressure.

YEAAAAGH!

I thought stoking was bad for your health!

I've heard of money to burn but this is ridiculous!

Bert

Thanks Cyril! We owe you one!

(wails) Ten million dollars!

Bert

We don't own him that much!

Okay, Bentley. I talked to your parents and they're very worried. They said it's alright for you to stay here for a while. I told them you were okay, but they'd rather hear it from you.

They'd be better off if they never heard from me again.

Melissa

That's a terrible thing to say, Bentley.

I think I'll go for a walk.

Bert

Want me to come with you, little buddy?

I'd rather be alone, Bert.

Bert

Don't worry. Bentley will come around. I know kids.

Bert

Here you are Bentley, this should keep you going for a while. Hey, I even brought some books I thought you might like.

Thanks a lot Bert, you're a real... (Looks at one of the book covers) COLLEGE MATHEMATICS?! You talked to my parents, didn't you? And they told you, didn't they? And you PROMISED!

Bert

I don't know what you're talking about Bentley!

Oh, sure! Then how do you know about the mathematics? You're just trying to make me feel guilty!

Bert

About what?! (Something dawns on Bert.) Hey...did you fail math or something?

As if you didn't know! Breaking into the school system was easy with my computer. So what if I gave myself a better mark? I wanted to be first! So I cheated, big deal! So now you know why I ran away. I'm a...a criminal...but I don't care!

We could use some help with these dishes, Bentley!

Oh lay off! I don't have to do anything I don't want to!

Bert

OK, I've had enough of this! Big tough guy huh?

Shh, He'll hear you!

Bert

Doesn't need anybody! Makes a mistake and then can't face up to it! Runs away!

Em, Bert, Remember, Understanding...

Bert

THIS HAS GOT TO BE SAID! So you want a life on the road eh Bentley? No home? No Family? No friends? You wanna be a...a fugitive, right?

That's right, a fugitive!

Bert

Never knowing if the next person you see is gonna put the finger on you and say, "There! That's the kid who cheated on his math mark!" HUH! Some life! Is that what you want?

Maybe...and maybe not...what else is there?

Bert

Well....for starters come and help us with the dishes, we'll figure out the rest later, okay?

Okay Bert.

Great! Held prisoner in my own home! By a computer, no less! "It'll do everything," you said! "It never makes mistakes," you said!

Eh, Heh, Heh...Just a few bugs in the system, Sir.

And you bug-brains programmed the system! I'll reprogram you when we get out of here!

Bert

(After avoiding the lasers) YOW! Phew, made it...but my sweater will never be the same.

What did we ever do before we got this computer?

Huh! Too much!