So what do you think of the view of the Evergreen River?
What river?
Well you can't miss it, it's right over... What?! The river! It's gone!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
YOU IDIOT! I wanted to push that! You blundering bacon buffoon!
Hang on Bert!
To what?!
(to Gertie who's driving the motorcycle he's sitting in) Do you have your pilot's licence for this thing?!
This is your first and final notice Mammoth. When the Sneer name goes up in lights, Mammoth Power will be snuffed out like a birthday candle!
Bert and I got this for you.
Wow! A brand new pair of hiking boots!
It's the ultra deluxe model. Good for 100,000 miles!
Yeah, we figured these should last you a few weeks anyway!
I've got to get to the 60th annual stunt motorcycle and shuffleboard tourney.
Well, we'd better start napping. We've gotta store a LOT of energy for Aunt Gertie's next visit!
The search for the fountain of youth? What's this all about?
POPig One
According to this book sir, one sip from this legendary elusive fountain can give someone eternal youth!
Eternal youth? Preposterous! Ridiculous! Ludicrous! (A long pause while Cyril thinks the idea over in his head) Find it immediately!
Oh, yes sir! Yes sir, immediately!
Bert! Come on down! There's someone here to see you!
I'll be right there!
Uh... hi! You must be Bentley?
And you must be hurt.
(chuckles) That's er... Bert! How was your trip?
Fine. How was yours?
Bentley, you're gonna be sharing Bert's room.
Mr. Bert, pleased to face your acquaintance.
Hey! Smart kid! Uh... (chuckles) He knows a foreign language! Uh, by the way, Bentley... Bentley?
How was your run Bert? (Bert pants then faints) That's nice!
Pop, can I borrow your old track shoes and Varsity sweater? It's for the track meet.
These shoes and I have seen a lot of good years together. And this sweater, it went great with my old raccoon-skin coat!
(appalled) Pop!
(chuckles) Just a joke, son...
Gee Bentley, I thought you had that ball for sure. Uh, you were right under it. Oh well, that's okay. Tomorrow, uh... we're gonna play football. Yeah, footballs are much easier to catch. And uh... after that, you can help me practice for the Forest Games!
Bert, enough! I'd prefer that tomorrow weren't like today.
Huh? What does that mean?
Today, I tried everything you wanted me to. (He takes the hot water bottle off his head, showing a large bump) And what have I got to show for it?
Gee Bentley, Bert was just trying to show you how much fun games can be. He meant well.
He made me feel unwell. I just wanna sleep now. Okay?
Okay, okay. Good night Bentley.
Good night.
Hey Melissa, what am I doing wrong? What have I got to do to get through to that kid?
If I gave out as much as my back does, I'd be broke!
This stuff tastes terrible! It must be good for me! (He gulps more) Ha! Strange taste. Would go well with jelly!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Raccoons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.