TV show quotes
So it's safe to say you're not going to Berkeley. Have you told your dad yet?
Sandy Cohen is a perceptive guy. I'm sure he'll figure it out.
Seth, you've got to tell him.
"Dad, I'm not applying to Berkeley... Where'd you get a gun?... Why do you have this gun?" Mmm, that doesn't have a good ring to it.
Hey Julie...
I got a gun, Guss.
That's cool.
[when the college counselor asks her what she wants] I want 365 sundaes, I don't mean the day after Saturday.
Summer, feel my forehead.
What? Why?
I have college fever. Don't you?
Maybe. What are the symptoms? You become incredibly annoying?
[to Summer] Intimacy, it's a tricky business.
Truth is, I moved out of a place like this when I was eighteen. I never thought I'd be back.
Yeah, well, when I was a kid, I wanted to be the wide receiver for the Chargers. Sometimes life don't work out.
Hey, guys, can't talk. I have to go see Dr. Kim.
You in trouble?
Uh, no. I have to change my college file. I got my SAT score.
Summer, we got our SAT scores back months ago.
Well, I took mine late. There was a Valley marathon the first time around.
Oh. How'd you do?
Ryan, come on. You never ask a lady her age, weight or SAT score.
I got a 2300.
[Ryan and Seth stare at her, dumbfounded.]
What? That bad?
What's with all the questions?
Nothing, I'm just trying to exhaust your issues so we can get to mine.
[to Sandy, after watching him flirt with Kirsten] You two are so perfect together it's almost painful to be around.
Did you just wack me with your tuba?
Did you just jab me with your pegleg??!
It was a tap, you little wacker.
It was a jab, you little jabber.
[to Seth] The point is, Summer doesn't want to be you, she wants to be with you.
[Seth, Summer, Ryan, and Marissa are in the diner, discussing how they're going to help Johnny.]
If any of you were remotely Jewish, I would just say we could pool our bar mitzvah money, but... Holy crap, that's it.
What's it?
No, no, no, no, no.
Yes.
No way, dude.
Yes way, dude.
I'm sorry, I can't. I'm not having it.
Having what?
A bar mitzvah.
Ryan gets a bar mitzvah. Now that is funny.
Yeah. Summer's laughing.
No, that's just gas.
[Summer slaps Seth.]
Now, listen to me. This wouldn't be an ordinary bar mitzvah. You know what this would be? Wait for it... A Chrismukkah bar mitzvahkkah. Spell that, dude.
That's crazy.
Yeah, so crazy it just might work.
So, how's this going to work? I'm just going stand in front of Newport and sing Hebrew?
You chant. And hell, yes.
Jews don't believe in saints, just really good stand-up comics.
Ryan doesn't wear glasses.
He does when he's reading from right to left.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The O.C. pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
