The New Batman Adventures · Season 1
Harley Quinn's escaped!
Seal all exits!
Maybe she went down the laundry chute?
None of the yahoos are crazy enough to pull that old stunt.
Ha.
(in the laundry room, Harley Quinn is inside a huge washer)
Help! Help! Ivy! Anybody! GET ME OUTTA HERE!
[Disguised as Joker] Well, well, Bruce Wayne. Join me. A bottle of your best, my dear, for my guest.
You'll understand if I refuse. The last time we met you tried to throw me off a building.
I did? Weeell... that was so long ago.
It was last month.
[starts sweating and wipes makeup off of his forehead] Well, gotta be going...
[Batman corners Ernie in the Iceberg Lounge's toilets]
Should have used more makeup, Ernie.
[Outside, the Penguin and his henchgirls listen in]
Why the disguise, Ernie? Where is he?
I dunno what you're talking about.
He can't threaten my guests.
Let me jog your memory.
[A flushing toilet and Ernie's bubbling screams are heard]
No laughing gas, no grins. No way Batboy could trace this back to me. (he and his henchmen get rocked by the boat) Hey, keep the boat in the water!
This wasn't in the job description.
Don't be stupid! You can't save that money!
I don't want to save it. I want to go with it.
You'd better call your fancy lawyers. (tosses Joker a nickel) Here, it's on me.
[being driven back to Arkham] After all, it's only money. [chuckles] So I'll let the taxpayers foot my bill again. Besides, it'll be nice to see the old gang.
[dressed as a guard] One of them's dying to see you too, puddin'.
Harley.
The one and only.
You... you don't know how happy I am to see you.
[brandishing a nightstick] Welcome to the club.
Harley, my dear, I can- (WHAM!) AH! - explain...! (POW!) OW! EEE! AH!
He always treats me like a kid.
Pardon me for saying so, but you are a kid.
Teenagers. I'm glad my Barbara is past her wild years.
(the analysis of the mud from Annie's father's shoe is complete)
Oh, my God. (runs to Batmobile)
What is it?
I know who Daddy is.
(Talking to Commissioner Gordon who is nearby about Clayface) We'll book him on the robberies and B & E, right? Anything else?
Yeah, murder.
Isn't it lovely? I've got to buy one.
For who?
(she slaps him)
What did I do?
Beware the Ides of March!
No, please! I'm too young to die!
Honey, you're never too thin, and you're never too young.
Pretty girl.
Don't you mean woman?! She was your age when she made that commercial, Bat Boy!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The New Batman Adventures pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
