Edipan? Monroe!
Ooh! Sorry, lass, my bad. (checking over a book with Ray Ray) I could've sworn it was next week. The magic calendar changes every year, and keeping track of the holidays is a nightmare.
It's the one-week a year where magic takes a holiday. Everyone in the community gets time off, including the Te Xuan Ze.
(gasps) Seriously? Does that mean I can go to drama camp over vacation without worrying about any magical freaks messing things up? (to the Skunk Monster) Oh, no offense.
Eh, none taken.
Hey, so what's the plan, huh? You wanna pick this up next week?
Uh, sure. (sets up a day on his date book) How about, uh, Thursday? No, wait, that's no good. I've got parent-teacher night at school. Uh, Friday okay?
Yeah, sure. I got forty-three of my wife's relatives coming over. They're gonna eat until their butts explode. Take my advice, cupcake - marry into a species that allows you to eat your young. (his phone rings and he answers it) Hello? (his wife is heard yelling through the phone) Yeah, I'm on my way right... Oh, for Pete's sake! They ate the hors d'oeuvres already? (checks his watch) Well, Edipan started, like, five minutes ago, those butt monkeys! (ends his call)
(through the phone) Oh, don't worry. There shouldn't be more than a thousand guests?
A thousand?! Ah-Mah! Look, I'm alright standing in front of people with a guitar slung around me, but a speech? (A mysterious figure passes by) Do I have to?
But you're a Te Xuan Ze, too. And you've got experience: the years of practice, the knowledge, a lack of throwing up in front of large groups. (a pair of blue eyes appear in the bushes)
(through the phone) You know I am retired.
Yeah, but Ah-Mah, I've only been at this whole battling-the-evil thingies for a little while. I'm still a rookie.
Yeah, bring it on, you big rib roast! This isn't my first time at the rodeo!
Yep, a classic, but it gets them every time.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Life and Times of Juniper Lee pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.