Juniper Kim Lee quotes from The Life and Times of Juniper Lee

Juniper Lee

(offscreen) Hey! (slides down the stairs) If you wanna go to this party with my friends, the least you can do is wrap the present.

Juniper Lee

Hello? (loud rock music is heard from the other side of the phone as the background turns into a half screen) Oh, hey, Ophelia.

Juniper Lee

Yeah, why?

Juniper Lee

Look, I said I would be there, okay? I'm just wrapping her present.

Juniper Lee

Uh, Baryshnikov is a ballet dancer.

Juniper Lee

Oh, totally. Oh, and you didn't get her one of those candles in the shape of a skull again, did you?

Juniper Lee

See ya. (ends her call and writes a birthday card for Jody)

Juniper Lee

(comes out of the house) No, it's true, Monroe. Everybody thinks you're cute. It's probably because they can't hear you talk.

Juniper Lee

(as she struggles to get Jody's present into her knapsack) Okay, now look, both of you better behave. Jody is my best friend, and I've flake out enough on her with all these creature feature battles I have to get into. So, for once, I would just like... (a jar drops from her knapsack) Oops.

Juniper Lee

Uh-oh.

Juniper Lee

Not so fast, big guy! (lands on the ground and drags the baresafer the way back to the jar)

Juniper Lee

(grabs the jar and stuffs the baresafer back into it) Ugh, you must chill! You have been in there for maybe, what, three hours? You're not a lifer who just made parole, okay, Shawshank?

Juniper Lee

Well, you never know when you're gonna need one of these guys, and they're harmless. They only attack evil creatures. (chuckles) Despite our vicious sarcasm. We don't qualify. Oh, uh, Ray Ray, would you hold Jody's present in your knapsack?

Juniper Lee

Would you rather have a wedgie so fierce you'll stop growing?

Juniper Lee

Hey! Happy birthday, Jody! (Jody hugs her) Sorry we're late.