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The Life and Times of Juniper Lee quotes

2,336 quotes · page 112 of 156

The Life and Times of Juniper Lee

All S1 S2 S3

S2 E7Bada Bing Bada Boomfist

What's with the dog? I hate dogs.

Ray Ray, what is this?

I told you, Boomfist is the only one who can beat Wrongness.

We have a potion.

Yeah, that isn't gonna be ready for 12 hours. And even when it is ready, it can't get close enough to Wrongness to use it. Except Boomfist can get close to Wrongness 'cause he's from the same world, plus he's beaten him 437 times, not to mention the Boomfist Thanksgiving TV special where he did it covered in radioactive gravy.

Yeah, that was a rough one.

I hate to admit it, but the boy has a point.

The dog talks. It gets better and better.

Excuse me, Superpants, but I'm taking your side in this.

Sorry, Monroe, he's upset because dogs destroyed his home planet.

(sighs) If it wasn't for the cats, we'd all be dead.

What kind of filth are you reading, boy?

(Wrongness applying for a job at Java Hut)

JHJava Hut employee

Do you have any personal references... You know, someone I can talk to?

WWrongness

Uh... Yes! Uh, the Intergalactic Federation of Evil!... Ohh, no, I'm kind of on the outs with them. Oh, oh! There's Doctor, Termino, no-no wait. I tried to, destroy him... Uh... No. No references.

JHJava Hut employee

(Sighs) Look, Carol.... you have no skills, you don't even have a home phone! Give me one reason to hire you.

WWrongness

...I can shoot lasers out of my eyes.

(Cut to Wrongness heating up coffee as an employee)

So his message to kids is "always use your fists" and "milk is bad for you?"

Why do you think mom work let me watch his shows?

Also, "don't go to school; hang out with your friends, or better yet, gangs" and "don't listen to your parents; they old and feeble."

(long pause)

You sure we got the good guy?

WWrongness

Wrongness must use toilet.

S2 E9June's Egg-cellent Adventure: Juniper Lee Meets the Easter Bunny

(after Ray Ray eats pieces of Sweetland's nature) Not everything is made of candy. You just ate a tree, leaves and dirt.

(yelling) IT'S NOT A DATE!!

(after William sent a message) What's it say?

RRabbit

(reading) Well it says, oh my. It's a poem entitled, My name is Monroe, I'm a fat fatty, I can't see my feet. All I loves to do is eat, eat, eat. (to Monroe) and eat, eat, eat was underlined 3 times.

(grabs the letter and gets angry) Rabbits, prepare for WAR!!!

S2 E10I've Got You Under My Skin

(pounding on the bathroom door) Dennis! C'mon! You said you'd be done in 5 minutes, it's been 15, I need to take a shower!

(heard inside the bathroom; groans) Get lost, dweeb! ...I'm shaving.

Ugh please, I have more mustache than you do. (Dennis opens the door and puts his head through, his chin and cheeks are covered in foam)

You said it, not me! (he wipes foam under June's nose and goes back in the bathroom, laughing, June wipes the foam off her lip)

Mom?...is that you...

Yes, honey?

I'm not feelin' very good...

Oh... not buying it. Get up!

Ugh. Was it that obvious?!

Oh, please, at least when your brother plays being sick, he fakes throwing up.

Uh, we're fine?

RRRay Ray Lee (June)

Hey, tell me something and be honest. Does my hair look extra bouncy today? Cuz seriously, watch this! (bounces her hair)

Ophelia Ramírez

Okay, who are you and what did you do with Juniper Lee?

MMonroe (Ray Ray)

Oooh nothing. She's just real excited (clears up throat and does American accent) She's just real excited because she- used a new conditioner. What a dweeb, eh? (Ray Ray snorts and him and Monroe start to laugh)

MMonroe (Ray Ray)

Can you keep the big fella on the run for a wee bit without getting caught?

RRRay Ray Lee (June)

What? You kiddin'? With legs this long I can outrun a greyhound!

MMonroe (Ray Ray)

Then off you go! Run like the wind!

(after the spell doesn't work right and June and Ray Ray are transformed into copies of Monroe and scream)

Look at ya! You're GORGEOUS! It's like Monroe.... in stereo!

Lemme see that stone! No way I'm staying like this for- hey, wait a minute.... I've got a tail!

S2 E11Welcome Bat Otter

(Comparing notes on Bat Otters) Okay... They range in size from three inches to four thousand feet tall, they're hairy and bald, have either wings, horns, horned wings, or winged horns, but the one thing everyone could agree on is... nothing.

And do you think you can to defeat them alone?

No, but I can hide under the bed like a girl.

S2 E12Dog Show Afternoon

Man, what's with all the shoes? You're just going to space camp for a week, not a light year.

Are you serious? I need two pairs for active wear, three pairs for classroom activities, three pairs formal, two pairs sensible, and two.. Oh, man. What if we go hiking? All right, what do you think? The boots or the cross trainers?

Those are the boots that the blubber troll ate and we had to fish out of his poop.

Oh, ick. Cross trainers.

These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Life and Times of Juniper Lee pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.