[referring to Sophia] If anyone blows the whistle on me the old lady is out on the street.
“Even Grandmas Get the Blues” · Season 6, Episode 19
In this episode: Dorothy Zbornak (4), Blanche Devereaux (4), Sophia Petrillo (3), Rose Nylund (2), Rebecca (1)
JJason
Isn't she the most beautiful mother you have ever seen?
GRAND...just GRAND.
[Blanche walks in wearing a slutty medieval-esque costume]
Am I convincing?
As what, Ye Olde Town Slut?
[entering kitchen] Dorothy, when was the last time you had sex?
That's a very personal question.
That long, huh? Perfect. Then you shall be the Queen of the Festival of the Dancing Virgins.
Ma, what are you talking about?
Once a year, the women of my village threw a festival to recapture their virginity. It gives you a chance to say to the man in your life "What kind of tramp do you take me for?"
We had a Festival of the Dancing Virgins in St. Olaf, too. Every year we'd go down to the lake and they'd be flopping around on the dock... Oh no, wait, that was the Festival of the Dancing Sturgeons.
What is wrong with you, woman?
I don't know what I'm gonna do about Jason. He's reached a point in his life where he's anxious to settle down, he wants us to have another child right away. Well frankly, I don't know if I want another baby so soon.
I understand. Wait a couple of years and... [starts to laugh] Medicare will pay for it.
Why wait? Have it now and the Enquirer will pay for it!
It's so unfair. We're both about the same age, but he can go on makin' babies the rest of his life. I feel like the Spruce Goose. People may visit, play with the controls, but I'll never really fly again.
[holding Aurora] Oh, what a good girl she was this mornin', she was just smilin' and smilin' and smilin'. I know sometimes it's just gas, but she was so cute.
[Sophia tugs on Dorothy's shirt and, when Dorothy looks her way, gives her a big, toothy smile.]
Ma, it's not cute anymore once you pass 80.
SSofia
Rose, before you bring in the sauce, tell us what ingredient you added.
Well, I don't want to spoil the surprise... I'll give you a hint: They're sugary and they're grrrrreat!
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