Is this the same juicer that I said, 'Mine, mine, mine'?
Yes...are you mad?
Yes, yes, yes.
S2 E2The Juicer
S2 E3Happy Anniversary
We thought it would be nice if we cooked the meal for Grandma and Grandpa's anniversary.
And I'm sure you girls will do a great job.
Theo, I mean all of us.
I don't cook.
Maybe you should learn.
Why?
Theo, you're going to leave this house one day and you're going to want to eat.
I'll have my girlfriend cook!
Now where are you getting this attitude from?
Cockroach.
CVClair, Vanessa, and Sondra
Ohhh Cockroach.
You see, we decided, we're only going to date girls who cook.
Theo, the women of today have better things to do than to stay in the kitchen.
That's because the women of today haven't met the man of tomorrow.
I've been to Europe and I didn't care for it.
Yeah, but it was 1943 and you were running alongside of a tank.
[Cliff and Clair are snuggling in bed. Cliff moves over closer to Clair.]
Cliff, your feet are freezing!
That's why I brought them over there.
Well, why don't you move your feet over to your side of the bed until they warm up?
[Cliff pulls his feet away.]
Now they're cold and lonely.
We thought it would be nice if we cooked the meal for Grandma and Grandpa's anniversary.
And I'm sure you girls will do a great job.
Theo, I mean all of us.
I don't cook.
Maybe you should learn.
Why?
Theo, you're going to leave this house one day and you're going to want to eat.
I'll have my girlfriend cook!
Now where are you getting this attitude from?
Cockroach.
CVClair, Vanessa, and Sondra
Ohhh Cockroach.
You see, we decided, we're only going to date girls who cook.
Theo, the women of today have better things to do than to stay in the kitchen.
That's because the women of today haven't met the man of tomorrow.
I've been to Europe and I didn't care for it.
Yeah, but it was 1943 and you were running alongside of a tank.
[Cliff and Clair are snuggling in bed. Cliff moves over closer to Clair.]
Cliff, your feet are freezing!
That's why I brought them over there.
Well, why don't you move your feet over to your side of the bed until they warm up?
[Cliff pulls his feet away.]
Now they're cold and lonely.
S2 E4Cliff in Love
Every time he goes out with the guys, he expects me to sit and wait for him, his plans are always more important than mine!
Why do you keep going back to this boy?
Dad, because he's wonderful! He's intelligent, he has a good sense of humor, and we have a great time together.
When? [Claire smacks him]
When we're not fighting.
CClaire
Well when is that? [Cliff smacks Claire]
So, you'll stay!
DDarell
I don't want to impose.
Ha! You're not imposing, have a little dinner with the Huxtable family.
DDarrell
Well okay, but only if you let me help with the meal.
You cook?
DDarrell
Yes, Dr. Huxtable I believe I told you that.
[in Sondra's direction] Ha-ha! Come on, we'll all go to the kitchen.
That way we'll be done before my ride gets here.
That's right, and by the time your ride gets here, maybe you'll have a new ride.
You don't have time!
DDarryl
Why not?
Because he's coming!
DDarryl
Who's coming?
Elvin.
DDarryl
Who's Elvin?
Elvin is the fellow she likes.
DDarryl
Oh. Then why am I here?
Because you're the fellow I like!
My mother works and I don't like it. Sometimes I come home and there's no dinner ready.
[laughing] What, are your hands broken?
Would you and Dr. Huxtable like some coffee?
Coffee?
Yes, coffee.
You mean, you're gonna get it?
Yes, you're surprised?
I'm sorry Mrs. Huxtable, I didn't think you did that kind of thing.
What kind of thing?
You know....serve.
[Cliff sits down rubbing his face]
Serve whom?
Serve him. [pointing to Cliff]
Oh, serve him! You mean like, serve your man?
Well yeah.
Let me tell you something Elvin. You see, I am not serving Dr. Huxtable. Okay?
Okay.
That's the kind of thing that goes on in a restaurant. Now I am gonna bring him a cup of coffee just like he brought me a cup of coffee this morning. And that, young man, is what marriage is made of, it is give and take 50/50. And if you don't get it together, and drop these macho attitudes, you ain't never gonna have anybody bringing you anything anywhere anyplace anytime evah! Now what would you like in your coffee?
Maybe I could get you some coffee.
Elvin that's all right. I don't mind getting it. But thanks for offering.
[Clair leaves room]
Elvin?
Yes sir?
When she brings the coffee back, if I were you I wouldn't drink it.
Every time he goes out with the guys, he expects me to sit and wait for him, his plans are always more important than mine!
Why do you keep going back to this boy?
Dad, because he's wonderful! He's intelligent, he has a good sense of humor, and we have a great time together.
When? [Claire smacks him]
When we're not fighting.
CClaire
Well when is that? [Cliff smacks Claire]
So, you'll stay!
DDarell
I don't want to impose.
Ha! You're not imposing, have a little dinner with the Huxtable family.
DDarrell
Well okay, but only if you let me help with the meal.
You cook?
DDarrell
Yes, Dr. Huxtable I believe I told you that.
[in Sondra's direction] Ha-ha! Come on, we'll all go to the kitchen.
That way we'll be done before my ride gets here.
That's right, and by the time your ride gets here, maybe you'll have a new ride.
You don't have time!
DDarryl
Why not?
Because he's coming!
DDarryl
Who's coming?
Elvin.
DDarryl
Who's Elvin?
Elvin is the fellow she likes.
DDarryl
Oh. Then why am I here?
Because you're the fellow I like!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Cosby Show pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.