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S5 E7

That '70s Show · Season 5, Episode 7

“Hot Dog (a.k.a. The Gifts)” quotes from That '70s Show

3 quotes

“Hot Dog (a.k.a. The Gifts)” · Season 5, Episode 7

In this episode: Eric Forman (2), Michael Kelso (2), Steven Hyde (2), Red Forman (1), Kitty Forman (1)

Kitty, I know these past few weeks have been hard on you, hard on all of us really. [Kitty glares at him] But especially hard on you. I mean since you found out you were . . .

Just say it Red, barren!

Well there's no reason for both of us to say it. So I got something to cheer my girl up.

Oh good, cause I finished off the last bottle this morning.

No, no. I got you a puppy. [holds up a Dachshund] He needs somebody to take care of him. His? mother got run over by a car.

Did you run over a dog, Red?!

[Eric just bought a gift for Donna]

So, Forman, you finally broke down, huh? What'd you get her? Earrings? A little bracelet?

No, I got her way more than a piece of jewelry. I got her a gift that really says something - a diamond engagement ring.

As a joke?

No, you guys, I'm gonna ask Donna to marry me.

As a joke?

Man, everyone's down on me and Donna getting engaged. You guys, my parents... even the magic 8 ball said, "Outlook not so good." I just... Look, I really think Donna would love an engagement ring.

Oh, she'll love the ring. It's the thought behind it that'll send her running for the hills. Or maybe she'll see how smart it is to get married when you're still in high school and have no money or future.

I know I ran when Jackie wanted to marry me. Except I ran for California instead of the hills. I mean the beach kicks the hills' ass! There's way more bikinis and they usually have a snack bar!

Maybe you guys are right. What if she thinks I'm moving too fast? Man, giving her this ring is a huge gamble. Am I man enough to make that bet? No! No! The answer is no!

You see, Forman? You try to do a nice, thoughtful thing and you screw it yourself. It's all about expectations, man. Like, I've taught Jackie to think I'm rude and inconsiderate. I can't disappoint her because I'm always disappointing her!

And if I don't give Donna the ring, what'll I do at the water tower? Oh, God! [puts on the Stupid Helmet] I do deserve this!

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