Dean Winchester quotes from Supernatural

Dean

Since when do you give a crap about vampires?

Crowley

Since, uh... what's today, Friday? Since, let's see... mind your business.

You do realize these were animal attacks.

Dean

An animal, out here? You think it came for the sailing?

Dean

You didn't sleep. Cause you don't... sleep.

Sam

Right.

Dean

Yeah, that's not creepy at all.

Sam

Bag him now?

Dean

No, we make sure.

Sam

Really?

Dean

Before we hand him over to a lifetime of demon rape? Yeah, really.

Sam

Boy, Cal just doesn't know when to quit.

Dean

Three scuzzy bars, one scuzzy strip club, a chili dog joint, seven or eight nightcaps, and now Scotches in the library. I'm getting cirrhosis just watching this.

Dean

[on the phone] UFO! UFO!

Sam

Oh. Dude, stop yelling, you're breaking up. I didn't catch that last part.

Dean

Close encounter! Close encounter!

Sam

Close encounter? What kind? First? Second?

Dean

They're after me!

Sam

Third kind already? Better run, man. I think the fourth kind is a butt thing.

Dean

Empathy, Sam! Empathy!

Sam

Look. That brings up a question. So, say you got a soul, and you're on a case. And your brother gets abducted by aliens.

Dean

Yeah, then you do everything you can to get him back.

Sam

Right, you do. But, what about when there are no more leads for the night? I mean, are you supposed to just sit there in the dark and suffer? Even when there's nothing that can be done at that moment?

Dean

Yes!

Sam

What?

Dean

Yes. You sit in the dark and you-you feel the loss.

Sam

Absolutely. But couldn't I just do all that and have sex with the hippy chick?

Dean

No!

Sam

It'll be in the dark.

Castiel

This is very complex. If the pizza man truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep slapping her rear? Perhaps she's done something wrong?

Dean

You're watching porn? Why?

Castiel

It was there.

Dean

You don't watch porn in a room full of dudes. And you don't talk about it. Just turn it off! [Castiel looks down at his lap] Now he's got a boner.

Dean

If you want forgiveness, find a priest.

I just want you to understand.

Dean

Oh, I understand. That you're a liar. You talk about putting blood first – which is funny 'cause you sound just like my dad - difference is, he actually did!

I am putting blood first.

Dean

Oh, give me a break.

Mary's my blood, my daughter! Don't come at me like I sold you out, Dean. You sold out your own mother! It was her or Sam and you chose Sam, plain and simple.

Dean

Oh, that is such crap. You wanna know what really happened? You chose a demon over your own grandsons!

See it how you want. I don't even know what Sam is. And you want me to protect him? And you? You're a stranger. No, really, tell me – what exactly are you supposed to be to me?

Dean

I'll tell you who I am. I'm the guy you never wanna see again. 'Cause I'll make it out of here, trust me. And the next time you see me, I'll be there to kill you.

Don't think there's gonna be a next time.

Dean

Whatever gets you though the night.

Dean

I'm trying to save your life!

Sam

Exactly, Dean! It's my life! It's my life, it's my soul. And it sure as hell ain't your head that's gonna explode when this whole scheme of yours goes sideways!

(after dying from a heart attack) Why?

Dean

You think maybe it was the extra cheese?

Yeah... It was good though.

Dean

So, Sam...

Sam

Yeah?

Dean

What's the last thing you remember?

Sam

The field. And then I fell.

Dean

Okay. And then?

Sam

Um, I woke up in the panic room.

Bobby

That's it? You really don't remember—

Dean

Let's be glad. Who wants to remember all that hell?

Sam

Well, how long was I gone?

Dean

About a year and a half.

Sam

What? I was downstairs f— I don't remember anything. So, how'd I get back? Was it Cas?

Dean

Not exactly.

Dean

(while reading Penny's diary) I've decided I'm going to give Stan my most precious gift...

Sam

Wow, that sounded really creepy coming out of your mouth.

Dean

I think I delivered it.

Sam

So what kind of thing likes virgins and gold?

Dean

P. Diddy?

Sam

You know, it's comforting.

Dean

What's that?

Sam

I died for a year, came back, and you're still not funny.

Dean

What do you know about dragons?

Bobby

What? Nothing.

Dean

Seriously.

Bobby

Well, they're not like the Loch Ness monster, Dean. Dragons aren't real.

Dean

Could you make a few calls?

Bobby

To who? Hogwarts?!