A character in Steven Universe
Played by Zach Callison
Steven Universe · 493 quotes
Most-quoted character in Steven Universe: in 327 of its 493 quotes
Most scenes with: Pearl (120), Amethyst (116), Garnet (110)
My limb enhancers! Where are my limb enhancers?!
StevenAww, you're like, an angry little slice of pie.
Stop talking! I demand to know what this place is and where I-- [looks up and sees all gems in bubbles; horrified] Oh my stars. You're going to harvest me?
Steven[getting padded by Peridot] Why are you acting like this?!
You smashed me into a limbless cloud, you trapped me in your bubble dungeon, and you called me... cute! [Steven evades her punch, face-flat on the floor]
StevenI didn't poof you! I freed you! [Peridot turns back]
Why would you make such a miscalculation?
StevenBack at the warp pad, what were you trying to say? Why do we need you? What do you know?
What do I know? Everything there is to know about the Cluster, you pebble!
StevenCluster? Wait, pebble?
My mission. The reason why I'm on this sad rock in the first place! I was to check progress on the Cluster! Just in and out, before it hatches. I wasn't supposed to get stuck here! But now it's going to emerge and nothing can stop it, and we'll all be shattered!!
StevenOkay, okay, wait, slow down. Now, from the top—emerging, hatching, Clusters?
You wanna know?
StevenYes.
You really wanna know?
StevenYes?
[in bathroom] Hmm... Seems I've discovered some sort of archaic... think chamber. Roomy, with a fresh hint of Earth citrus. [lifts toilet seat] A perfect crossroads for my escape.
[fiddling the bathroom doorknob] It's locked.
Peridot, open the door! [flushing sounds are heard]
Uh, if you're trying to flush yourself down the toilet, it won't work. [cut to Peridot spinning inside the toilet bowl] Trust me, I've tried.
How did she get out?! We bubbled her!
Maybe we needed a bigger bubble.
My bubbles are fine.
Steven[sweating nervously] I did it.
[shocked] Steven, why would you do such a thing?!
StevenBecause she knows something. Something that's made her scared.
Duh, Homeworld girl knows we're gonna beat her into a green pancake.
StevenNo, not 'cause of us. 'Cause of something called "the Cluster."
Cluster? That's new.
What else did she tell you?
StevenThat's all I got.
That's right, you dirt bombs! You don't even know what's coming! [notices her reflection in the mirror] Ooh…
I'm tired of playing these games. If we can't fight her, fine. We'll talk. Peridot!
[slips off the sink] Whoa!
All right, no more fighting. Let's just have a civil conversation.
As if I'd negotiate with you, filthy war machine!
[summons her gauntlets] Okay, let's kick her butt.
StevenWait!
Yeah! Destroy me again! [hangs on bath curtain pole with a plunger] And have fun trying to talk to me when I'm in a bubble! [almost slips off]
I really hate to say it, but unfortunately if she has information, she's more valuable to us like… this.
This is going to be tricky. [hear knobs turning, water splashing]
H-h-hot hot hot!!
StevenYou have to turn the knob the other way for cold! [later in the kitchen with the Gems] Wait, so we're just gonna let her live in my bathroom?
Well, yes. What other option do we have? Keep her outside on a leash?
What a great souvenir of that other time you assaulted me.
StevenOh, right, sorry. I can take it back.
No, it's too late! You… wouldn't happen to have the rest?
Steven[washing his face] Uh, sorry, we lost them. Well, we kinda threw 'em away. [points to his toothbrush, sitting on the floor next to her] Can you pass me that?
[picks it up] Is this a weapon?!
StevenOnly for cavities. [Peridot tosses him his toothbrush] Thanks!
[gestures to a comb] Is that a weapon?
Steven[while brushing his teeth] No. That's a comb I never use.
[climbs onto the toilet and gestures to the towel he's holding] Is that a weapon?
StevenHmm? Oh, well, I guess if you get it wet and roll it up. [rolls up his towel, making Peridot flinch in fear] Look, I know you're scared, but I'm not going to hurt you. And whatever's going on, whatever the "Cluster" is, I wanna help.
I doubt you can help me, but I… appreciate the offer.
Steven[smiles] Now, do you mind moving (aside)? [points at the toilet] I have to use that.
[as the star iris closes in on her] For what?
[knocking on the bathroom door] Open the door, Peridot! If this "Cluster" is putting us in danger, you need to tell us what it is so we can (find it and) stop it!
No! I hate you! I'm not telling you anything about the Cluster!
Oh, come on. Is it like a big, hunk of granola?
What's granola?
I'm sure it's not granola. Now, Peridot, I'm sure we can reach some sort of agreement. Perhaps a trade is in order?
Oh, sure. Why don't you just give me back my leg enhancements and my arm attachments with my screen and my log and all my information? Oh, wait, YOU DESTROYED THEM! So, no, I don't think we can reach some sort of agreement!
[The Crystal Gems groan in annoyance]
Steven[flushing the toilet] Okay, Peridot, you can turn around now. [exits the bathroom; clears throat] Sorry for interrupting your interrogation.
Don't worry about it, Steven.
I swear, Peridot is gonna crack any second now.
I'll never crack for the likes of you, you… Crystal Clods! [laughs]
[angrily] Ooh, I got your clods right here, you little…!
[puts her hand on her shoulder] Hold on, Pearl. If she's not gonna be of any help, let's investigate this thing on our own.
StevenI'll come with you.
Sorry, Steven. We're gonna need you to stay here and keep an eye on our…guest.
StevenReally?
Yeah. Make sure she doesn't try anything.
Don't worry. She's harmless without her limb enhancers.
I'M NOT HARMLESS!
Oh, hush up!
StevenMy dad's from Earth, but my mom's a Gem.
You're some sort of hybrid? How is that possible?
StevenThe answer to that is a story I like to call, "The Ballad of Rose and Greg."
These are the early attempts at artificial fusion.
StevenThat's a lot of gem shards.
We were growing them here at this very site. But these were just prototypes for the final product, a singular giant artificial fusion, comprised of millions of gem shards…the Cluster.
StevenPeridot, you're saying there's a giant mutant gem the size of the Earth under us right now?
Oh, no. When it forms, it'll be much, much bigger than the Earth. Right now, it lies dormant, incubating in the Earth's core. But when it emerges and takes its physical form, it will destroy the planet. The prototypes are already emerging. The Cluster is next. If we can't get off this planet, we've got to stop the Cluster! I thought it'd be impossible, but now we have a chance.
StevenWhat is it?
[grabs Steven's shoulders and grins malevolently] It's you, Steven! [she and Steven climb out of the control room] Now that you're filled in, we can get to work!
StevenUhh, how am I supposed to help?
Well, you have all the information that we need about Earth and its erratic behavior. Put that together with my expansive knowledge of the Cluster and we just might be able to stop it!
StevenNo, Peridot, I don't think you get it. Just because I know how clouds work doesn't mean I know how to stop a giant mutant in the center of the earth. Besides, the only reason that I know anything about clouds and rain is because my dad told me.
What are you talking about?
StevenI used to be really scared of thunderstorms, just like you. Then Dad explained how rain and all that stuff works, then I wasn't scared of rain anymore.
Well, I'm sure you have other knowledge about how this planet works.
StevenSure, but none of it's gonna help us. If we want to stop this Cluster thing, we'll need help from the Crystal Gems.
I said I don't need them! Let's just warp me back to the bathroom, or whatever you call it, and we'll take care of this. If it looks really bad, then we can just ask this "dad" for help, right?
What is that?!
Steven[speaking with the Cluster puppet] It's the Cluster.
It does not look like that. But it is real, and it can activate at any moment!
What a cluster.
That abomination must be stopped.
But how? We'll need to build some sort of machine to take us to the center of the Earth, it'll have to-
[swats at Pearl, interrupting her] Hey! I wasn't finished speaking! What we need is to build some sort of machine to take us to the center of the Earth.
All right. What we have here in the barn should be adequate enough for us to get started. First, I recommend we organize the component types, and assemble a rough blueprint based off what we have available. Sorry, Steven. It's a lovely drawing, but it won't look like this. [Steven stops spinning on the swivel chair, now frowning]
[examines piece of chalk] Hmm... Good. Yes, this is adequate. Thank you. You can go now.
..Uh, what?
Hm? [beat] Umm, that will be all? [claps to her for a beat, whispers to Steven] How do you get her to leave?
Excuse me, I am not leaving.
StevenYeah! She's gotta stay here to help us build the drill thing, right?
[laughs] No, no, you're confused. A Pearl can't build a thing like this.
StevenWhy not?
Because Pearls aren't for this! They're... for standing around, an-and looking nice, and uh... holding your stuff for you. Right?
That's enough! If we're going to work together, you're going to have to listen to me.
Listen to you? [starts laughing, turns to Steven] Did you teach her to talk like this?
StevenWhat are you talking about?
She's a Pearl. She's a made-to-order servant just like the hundreds of other Pearls being flaunted around back on Homeworld.
StevenWait... There's hundreds of Pearls?!
[nervous] Well... yes, but—
[holding Pearl's sash] And she looks like a fancy one, too. [Pearl gasps]
StevenHundreds of Pearls...
So, who do you belong to anyway?
[grabs her sash away from her] Nobody!!
Then... what are you for? [Pearl recoils back] Well, you can belong to me for now. Ha! A Peridot with a Pearl? What would they say back home?
Now listen here, you tiny twerp! In case you've forgotten, you're on our turf now! And I didn't fight a thousand-year war for this planet's independence to take orders from the likes of you!!
Excuse me? I am a natural technician and a certified Kindergartener. I was made for this! You were made to take orders, not to give them!
StevenWhoa, whoa, hang on, guys! Now, we can all agree that you are both good at building things, so... can't you just try listening to each other?
NO!
I'm as good at building things as you! Better, even!
Ha! Name one thing you could engineer better. Go on!
Steven[whispers] Robots.
Hm?
StevenYou should build robots. Giant robots! I see a race. A giant robo-race... with prizes. Giant robo-prizes!
You mean like a competition?
StevenYeah! To see who's better at building stuff!
What are these robots you speak of?
StevenThey're like those funky marble guys you were sending—only bigger, and you can ride them! [makes robot noises]
Hah! Building one of these robots will be easy!
Well, I can build one faster!
That's what you think!
[talking into a tape recorder] Log date 7-1-1-2. It's the third rotation of the Earth since commencements of a... collaborative approach to stopping the Cluster.
I've finished drawing up the blueprints for the drill head. Peridot, if you could come take a look at this?
Remind me again why I should listen to you? Oh, right. [plays recorder; thru recorder] The Pearl here has developed an aptitude for engineering that I begrudgingly respect. But that doesn't explain the spontaneous singing... crying... singing while crying.
[to Steven; annoyed] Why did you give her that?
StevenWell, we did destroy all her stuff. I thought it might help make her feel a little better.
[thru recorder] Clod! [fast-forwards] Mighty clod! [fast-forwards] Running out of ways to say clod.
All right. I chased away those cows. Now let's get to work.
[to Garnet; clears throat] Before we begin, would you mind unfusing? It's making me incredibly uncomfortable.
[beat as Steven, Amethyst and Pearl nervously look to Garnet. The scene then cuts to Garnet leashing Peridot to a fence.]
[as Garnet walks away] What?! What'd I say?!
StevenDid we really have to do that?
Her having free reign of the place made me incredibly uncomfortable.
[Steven and Amethyst walk up to a leashed Peridot growling over a microwave]
I just need some sort of leverage optimizer...
Leverage optimizer?
That's what I said.
Ohhh! Ha! You mean you want a screwdriver? [laughing]
Do you have one or not?
StevenUh... [hands a screwdriver] Why don't you just use this one?
Because it was outside my radius.
He-hey... Hey, Peridot... [points to her nose] What do you call this?
A scent sponge.
StevenHuh? [Amethyst laughs some more]
Okay... [opens her eye] what's this?
Vision sphere.
StevenPeridot, that's—
Wait, wait, Steven! Peridot... [waves her fingers] these?
[getting annoyed] Touch stumps.
[points to her foot] This?!
Gravity connectors.
This?!
THAT'S YOUR BUTT!!! [Steven and Amethyst laugh out loud]
StevenOh, man, Peridot, you're killing me!
I am not! That would violate our truce agreement!
No, no, no! You're funny!
Funny?
The strangest thing is, Amethyst... you think you have to listen to them! [laughs] You are the one they should put you in charge!
Ha! That's your best joke yet.
No, really. Pearl is a Pearl. Garnet is a fusion. I don't even know what he's supposed to be.
StevenHey!
You're the only Crystal Gem that's actually a Gem!
Uh... [laughs nervously] What?
You outrank everyone on your team. They should be listening to you. You're a strong, singular, fully-functional soldier, despite the fact that you're defective.
..Defective?
Well, sure. You're small.
So?
Well, you're not supposed to be! Hold on, wait, wait. Let me guess. [points to Amethyst's hole] This— [runs to hole] This is the hole you came out of. Too small, too low, the exit marks look about 500 years newer than every other hole. Hmm... this place must have been empty when you came out. No wonder you have no idea what you're supposed to look like!
StevenPeridot... [Amethyst holds Steven on the shoulder]
What was I supposed to look like?
Well, you're a quartz. They're huge, loyal soldiers. You should be twice your size. Broad shouldered, intimidating, but you simply stayed in the ground too long.
Are you saying I'm wrong?!
[laughing] Gemetically speaking, yes. When you think about it it's also... [snickers] funny! [Amethyst feels more enraged]
StevenAmethyst?
Hey, soldier. Maybe you can help me get this hunk of drill off.
[Amethyst violently slashes the drill head off of an Injector with her whip]
See? Look at that! You can do everything a normal quartz can do. Let's head back and shove this thing in Pearl's face!
StevenAmethyst? Are you okay?
Don't worry about it.
[narrating] I was back. I was someone and I didn't know who. But I felt I was getting the hang of my strange new form. [beat] And then I fell.
Ahh! [tumbling down a hill and crashes in bushes] Ouch... [a sword is pointed to her face] Aahh! Don't hurt her! Don't hurt... me?
[Pan up to see Pearl as the sword bearer]
It's you... the fusion.
We didn't mean to fuse! Well... well, we did this time. We'll unfuse! We-we'll... w-we'll... [Rose Quartz comes by]
No, no, please. I'm glad to see you again.
And there they were - Rose Quartz, the leader of the rebellion and her terrifying renegade Pearl.
I don't... upset you?
Who cares about how I feel? How you feel is bound to be much more interesting.
How I feel? I-I feel... uh, lost... and scared... a-and happy. W-Why am I so sure that I'd rather be this than everything I was supposed to be, and that I'd rather do this than everything I was supposed to do? [Rose chuckles and smiles]
Welcome to Earth.
C-Can you tell me?! How was Ruby able to alter fate? Or, why was Sapphire willing to give up everything? W-What am I?!
No more questions. Don't ever question this. You already are the answer.
[Flashback story ends as Garnet concludes]
StevenSo…what was it? The answer?
[whispers] Love.
StevenWow… I knew it.
So did I.
[Steven runs and hides to an edge of the barn; he de-ages into his normal state]
StevenOhhh, geez! If I can just keep this up for the rest of my life, no one will suspect a thi—
[he sees wide-eyed Amethyst and Greg staring at Steven for a beat; he drops a piñata stick]
What are you doing?!
Steven[stammers] U-uh— well, what are [ages back] you doing?
What are you doing to your body?!
Woah, woah, woah... Have you been stretching yourself out all day?!
StevenNo! I was just... slouching.
Why are you doing this? It... really isn't like you.
StevenBecause, Dad! I can't stay a kid forever! When Connie grows up and becomes president, what is that gonna make me? First Boy?!
Steven, you can't just keep stretching forever. If you hold it too long, you could really hurt yourself.
StevenYeah, well, I'm half-human so maybe it works different for me! We'll just have to wait and see, right?!
[sighs] Steven...
Whoahh, come on and sing it with me
Sing?
StevenThe words relate to the key
Key?
StevenIf it's a pattern, if it's a pattern
Then just repeat after me.
PearlDeedee Lynn Magno · 149 quotes
GarnetEstelle · 145 quotes
AmethystMichaela Dietz · 133 quotes
PeridotShelby Rabara · 82 quotes
Connie MaheswaranGrace Rolek · 45 quotes
Greg UniverseTom Scharpling · 43 quotes
Blue DiamondLisa Hannigan · 28 quotes
LarsMatthew Moy · 28 quotes
Lapis LazuliJennifer Paz · 27 quotes
SapphireErica Luttrell · 25 quotes
RRubyCharlyne Yi · 23 quotes
Yellow DiamondPatti LuPone · 23 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Steven Universe pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
