Amethyst quotes from Steven Universe

Amethyst

Maybe you're better off with her / I think she's better for you / I forgot how great it felt to be us / Guess I got carried away. / I had to use you to make me feel strong / But I don't care about that now / I see a tower built out of my mistakes / And it all comes crashing down. / Is there something I can doo-oo / Is there something I can doo-oo-oo / Is there something I can doo-oo / Can I make it up to you?

Amethyst

All right, Rose. We saw that glow. So why are you still a baby? Is it really fun or something? [shapeshifts into a baby] Garnet, hold me. [Garnet holds her] All right, I get it. This rules. But it's been so long, like months! That's longer than I was a toilet!

Steven

You're back!

Amethyst

Hey, Steven, look at this! [pulls out small cackling skull]

Pearl

Whoa! What are you, crazy?! [knocks the skull out of Amethyst's hand and stomps it]

Steven

What the heck was that?!

Pearl

An Electric Skull, our Crystal Palace was swarming with them.

Amethyst

They were after this. [takes out an hourglass from her fanny pack]

Steven

[entranced] Can I see that?

Amethyst

Yeah, sure.

Pearl

[interrupts] No! It’s extremely powerful, we shouldn't have even brought it home.

Steven

Garnet! Tell Pearl to let me see the thing! [Garnet puts finger to his lips]

Garnet

Shh...

Steven

Aw, man! I wanna come next time! I even wrote us a song. [takes out ukulele] It’s like: If you’re— W-wait, hold on. Hmm... [tunes ukulele, singing]

Steven

[with starry eyes] No way. I-It can't be! Wha-- Where did you get these?! I thought they stopped making them!

Pearl

Well, we heard that too, and since they're your favorite...

Amethyst

We went out and stole a bunch!

Pearl

[grunts at Amethyst angrily] I went back and paid for them.

Garnet

The whole thing was my idea.

Amethyst

It was everyone's idea.

Garnet

Not really.

Pearl

All that matters is that Steven is happy.

Steven

[begins to rap] Oooohhh…!

Steven

I can't believe you did this. I’m gonna save these forever! Right after I eat this one. Hello, old friend. [bites into one] Oh, so good! [Steven's gem begins to glow] I like to eat the ears first.

Amethyst

Uh, Steven..?

Steven

Wha? My gem!

Amethyst

Quick! Try and summon your weapon!

Steven

I don’t know how! [panicking] Ah, it's fading! How do I make it come back?!

Pearl

Calm down, Steven. Breathe, don't force it.

Amethyst

Yeah, and try not to poop yourself either.

Garnet

Please, don't. [Steven's gem glow fades away, collective sigh]

Steven

Ah, I was really close that time! Can one of you just explain how to summon a weapon?

Steven

I think my best bet is to recreate what happened the last time my gem glowed. So, [points] Garnet and Amethyst were here. Pearl was next to the fridge. Hmm... Amethyst, I think your arms were crossed?

Amethyst

Okay, your Majesty. [crosses arms]

Steven

And Pearl, your foot was like this. [moves it at the angle it was]

Pearl

I don't think it works this way, Steven.

Steven

And Garnet— uhh... [mushes her face upward] Yeah.

Steven

Then I took a bite of this Cookie Cat. Oh, wait! I sang the song first. Uh, he’s a frozen treat..all new taste..interstellar war, now available at Gertman's... Aw! It was funnier last time! [beat, sighs] Maybe I'm not a real Crystal Gem.

Pearl

Don't be silly, Steven. Of course you are.

Amethyst

And you’re fun to have around, even if your gem is useless. [Pearl growls]...I mean, you’re one of us, Steven. We're not the Crystal Gems without you! [Garnet nods]

Steven

Yeah, even if I don't have powers, I still got... Cookie Cat! [takes a bite] Oh, so good. [Steven’s gem glows then summons his shield, collective gasp]

Pearl

Steven... it's a shield!

Steven

Oh-ho, what?! I get a shield?! Oh... YEAH!!

Steven

Huh? Cookie Cat! I summon my weapon by eating ice cream!!

Pearl

What's in these things?

Garnet

This is bad.

Pearl

[looks through telescope] Look at the size of it! I had no idea these things were so big!

Amethyst

Garnet! Pearl! [runs to them carrying Steven]

Pearl

We saw. Some of us are trying to protect humanity! Where were you? [Amethyst puts Steven down]

Amethyst

..Eating fry bits.

Pearl

[facepalms] Ugh!

Steven

Can I see? [peers] Whoa...

Steven

It's a giant eyeball! Awesome!

Pearl

Not awesome! It's a Red Eye!

Steven

A Red Eye?! It's going to infect us all!

Garnet

That's pinkeye, Steven. [Amethyst laughs]

Pearl

It’s going to crash into Beach City and crush us, along with a bunch of oblivious, innocent people! We have to stop it!

Steven

What are we going to do?

Garnet

The only thing powerful enough to destroy it is a light cannon that belonged to Rose Quartz.

Steven

My mom?

Amethyst

If Rose were here, this would be so easy.

Pearl

I know, but she's not. And the cannon is missing. We'll have to find another solution.

Steven

If it belonged to my mom, I bet my dad knows where it is. He can help us save the day! Ah? Eh?

Pearl

..Greg is... nice, Steven. But I doubt someone like Rose would entrust someone like him with such a powerful weapon.

Amethyst

Your dad is kinda a mess, Steven.

Pearl

Amethyst!

Amethyst

I'm just sayin'! Even if she did leave it with him, he probably broke it, or lost it, or dropped it in the ocean somehow.

Garnet

True.

Steven

[speaks to the cannon] Please work! Unlock! Activate! Go, please! Everyone's counting on you, you can't just be useless! I know you can help!

Greg

It's okay, Steven! We'll figure out something else! Something even better.

Steven

R-r-right... If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hotdogs...

Pearl

It's working!

Pearl

Steven!

Amethyst

This is it!

Garnet

Brace yourselves!

Pearl

We fought a giant bird. We're only here for a second, we've got to go back out.

Steven

What? Why?

Pearl

Because we have to place this Moon Goddess Statue at the top of the Lunar Sea Spire before midnight. Without it, the whole place will fall apart. Oh Steven, you should have seen the spire in its heyday. It was an oasis for Gems on Earth. It's abandoned now, but we can still save it with this statue.

Steven

What? That's perfect!

Pearl

What? Why?

Steven

Because I can help carry it for you, in this! [takes backpack out of package]

Pearl

A hamburger?

Steven

It's a novelty backpack, shaped like a cheeseburger. Aww, I blew it. [puts the backpack over his shoulder] I was just going to wear it one day, and you guys would be like "Dang, Steven, that's so cool", but this is obviously important Gem business.

Pearl

Yes, so you should let us take care of it.

Steven

What? I'm a Gem! [lifts up shirt and points to gem]

Pearl

But you've still got a lot to learn.

Amethyst

So let him come! [waves hands] It'll be educational.

Pearl

Hmm, alright. [hands statue to Steven] You can carry it in your hamburger.

Pearl

Amethyst, you're overdoing it.

Amethyst

[as a bluejay] Ah, chill it, dude!

Pearl

Just because you can shapeshift, doesn't mean you should.

Steven

Can you shapeshift?

Pearl

Well, of course-

Amethyst

[sarcastically, transformed into Pearl] Well, of course I can! I'm perfect! [slaps her behind] WHOMP, WHOMP! [laughs as Pearl pushes her aside]

Pearl

All Gems have shapeshift powers, Steven. We can turn into objects, we can change parts of our bodies, or... we could do that.

Amethyst

[slapping her behind again] WHOMP, WHOMP!

Pearl

Steven! [climbs onto dock and holds his hand] Okay, let me see it. W-? Y-you got them to go away? [Steven smiles] It just goes to show, always listen to me, and never listen to Amethyst.

Amethyst

That's fair.

Garnet

It goes to show, you should have a little more faith in Steven. [Pearl blushes]

Steven

Yeah, that would have been a total "cat-tastrophe"!

[sarcastically] Hahahahaha...

Steven

But I'm feeling much better "meow"!

Steven

What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?

Garnet

Okay, that's enough. [The Gems leave in annonyance]

Steven

Wait, l've been comimg up with cat jokes all morning. You guys, l'm "feline" fine. Everything's "purr"- fect!

Amethyst

Looks like we're gonna have to split up.

Pearl

Right. Steven and I will stay right here where it seems to be safe... while you guys go and solve the mystery of this place.

Steven

Wait! I wanna help solve the mystery!

Amethyst

Yeah! Come on, Steven! [picks him up] Let's solve the mystery.

Steven

Yeah! Mystery solvers! [Pearl takes Steven]

Pearl

Nope. No, no, no, no, you two are a disaster waiting to happen.

Garnet

Steven goes with me.

Steven

Really? Awesome!

Garnet

But remember — this is a serious mission.

Steven

[still being held by Pearl] Understood. Serious Steven... Pearl, can you put me down?

Pearl

What? Oh, yes, of course. [lets him down]

Steven

I need to be standing or else it doesn't work. Serious Steven... activate!! [goes with Garnet]

Pearl

But this could be the teacups all over again!

Steven

Hey! I've put that behind me.

Garnet

We're back where we started.

Steven

Whaaat?! [Pearl comes in]

Pearl

Garnet! There you are! The doors and rooms here make no sense! They all bring you back here! [Amethyst runs out of a door growling and screaming]

Amethyst

Get me outta here! [runs into another door]

Pearl

There are sixteen doors and we entered from the northeast, and went through three consecutive rooms in a straight line... [Amethyst returns with a bear trap on her head]

Amethyst

Ow! Rrrrr-rah!! [throws bear trap, runs back where she came]

Pearl

But arrived back here out the southernmost door, which can only mean... W-well, I don't know what it means! I— [cool mist blows out; Amethyst slides along inside a block of ice] This is a death trap!! [tries to break Amethyst free with her spear]

Steven

What... what do we do?!

Garnet

We go back in... again, and again, and again, and again.

Steven

[gasp] I CAN'T!!

Pearl

Steven!

Garnet

It's okay.

Steven

No! No, it's not! You were all right about me! I wanted to do this so bad, but now I feel like I'm gonna throw up. THIS IS JUST LIKE THE TEACUPS!!!

Pearl

Oh, Steven, I-I didn't really mean that—

Steven

WAAAAIT!!! Ah!! Wait, you guys! What if this is just like the teacups? That's why we're getting so lost... That's why I'm feeling so sick! All the rooms are spinning us around so we end up here!

Pearl

How could you possibly think punching a blood polyp was a good idea?! Look at all the gunk you got on me! And look at Steven! [brief pause; Steven is nowhere to be found]

He's gone! Gone, gone, GONE!

Steven

[rushes back to the gems] It's not so bad once you get use to it! Why? 'Cause you like dogs, princesses, whores, and [in a bossy attitude] To eat my shorts!

Amethyst

See? He likes it.

Pearl

He certainly won't brotherfuckin' like it when it hardens!

Steven

Uh, what? Uh, I'm gonna go wash. [begins to walk away]

Pearl

He shouldn't have been so close in the first place. [Steven hardens in place near fridge]

Amethyst

How was I supposed to know they pop? [Steven struggles]

Steven

Uh, guys...?

Pearl

You're always putting us in danger with your little outbursts! [Amethyst ignoring her] Ugh, you are just... so childish!!

Amethyst

Yeah, yeah. Don't forget: reckless, vulgar, "loudmouthed". And that's just what makes me so AWESOME!! RIGHT, GARNET?!!

Garnet

Amethyst... you are a Crystal Gem. You need to act like it. [Amethyst pauses for a long beat]

Amethyst

Fine. [walks through temple door into her room]

Pearl

I think we really got through to her. [Garnet sighs; she walks to the front door with Pearl behind] Right, Garnet? [she closes door, Steven is still hardened]

Steven

Guys?

Pearl

[about to bubble desert glass] We should've done this in the first place.

Amethyst

In my defense, I forgot.

Steven

[to Lion] So I guess, this is goodbye. We had some good times, but I'm sure you have other magical stuff, to smash with other magical boys. [moving Lion's lips] "I love you Steven. I want to stay with you forever!" [gasp] Really? Guys you hear that?

Pearl

Are we really going to let him keep that?

Garnet

We kept Amethyst.

Pearl

[laughs hysterically] Oh, oh ho ho, "kept Amethyst", oh Garnet, that's priceless!

Steven

Yay, Lion! [makes Lion wink] Wink!