As a show of good faith, you have to release 1, maybe 2 million of the hostages.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Basically, by 6 o'clock, anyone in the city with breasts is going to hate us.
Welcome to my world.
Why couldn't the Mayor just stand up?
(Male coworkers chuckling)
What? What am I missing?
How am I gonna explain this. Okay, Nikki. Even though the Mayor wasn't actually standing...he was at full attention.
Nooo.
Yes, now how are we gonna explain this little snub to the Woman's Action Caucus?
Snub? The man paid the woman the ultimate compliment!
Yeah, if they were orangutans.
Can't you guys control those things?
Not always.
You can scold it, or smack it around a little bit. That only seems to encourage it.
I am fascinated.
Sometimes all it takes is a thought, memory...sometimes all it takes is a slight breeze.
Why do women always go for losers like him?
What, instead of losers like you?
We've got to rescue her from that monster!
He's her boyfriend, he's not Jason.
George is not some kind of deadbeat. I'll have you know that he's a writer! [Mike, Carter, and Stuart all groan] He's writing a screenplay! [They groan louder] What's wrong with that?!
He's a writer! That's like an actor who's too lazy to work at a restaurant!
He's using you for a free ride, Nikki. Trust me, I know guys like him...I am guys like him.
If you'd given me any more time I could've recovered.
Paul, if I'd have given you any more time up there, you would have declared the Mayor dead.
It was back in the '60s, and I was at this party and some idiot spiked the Kool-Aid. Before I knew it, I was 3/4 up a pine tree, naked as a jay bird, trying to get away from all the giant bugs, there.
Well, there you have it. Okay, so I tell the press that you were in a mental hospital...because you were taking acid.
Coincidentally, that was the same night I decided to run for Mayor.
Playing doctor should be left to qualified professionals. And of course, curious youngsters.
(to the porn actresses) I'm Deputy Mayor Michael Flaherty, and I'm going to pretend I don't know who any of you are.
(to Stuart) Ok, Stuart. Inside that is some of the biggest names in the porn business. Your heroes.
Can't you tell if a man is handsome?
Huh, nice try.
I can't get from ESPN to the Comedy Channel without some big penis waving in my face.
Where are you watching television?
(reading cue cards) Good afternoon, all. I want to start out with a personal outrage that has been going on too long. Public access... (switches cards) ...pornography.
(to James) You want to work on where you break those cards.
(reading cue cards) I just want to make sure that material with graphic sexual content is available and seen... (switches cards) ...only by those people who specifically want to see it.
(to James) Ok, you did that one on purpose.
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