John Layfield quotes from Royal Rumble

If Amy looks good sober, can you imagine what she's gonna look like after this bottle?!

[on Daniel Bryan] Chinese calendar says 2015 is the year of the goat; we're about to find out if that's true!

It's been well-documented, JBL, that when Mr. Kennedy can target a body part, he will be relentless and rabid on the assault throughout the match-up, and that's what he's doing here.

Just what I said. Just exactly what I said! I'm sitting out here with a damn parrot!

[on entry #9] It is the Harvard Law School graduate, David Otunga.

All right! Jennifer Hudson's husband!

Otunga entering his third Royal Rumble match. All three of us here at ringside have been part of the Royal Rumble match. John, you've actually been in five in your career; one year, you lasted nearly 36 minutes, as Otunga goes right after Goldust.

You'd been in one, hadn't you, Michael?

Yeah, last year, I lasted...

How long did you last?

Almost two minutes.

Did anybody last less than you?

Yes.

Who?

Jerry "The King" Lawler.

How long did he last?

Less than a minute.

You lasted longer than Jerry Lawler?

Yes.

Wow. Did you beat him at WrestleMania too?

Yes.

Hey, listen. I've stopped listening, you can stop talking.

[on Bray Wyatt's backwards crab walk] This freak needs an exorcist.

Yeah. Linda Blair.

She was not the Exorcist.

No, she was the one that needed to be exorcised. That was so long ago, I don't think anyone remembers. That was, like, the early 70s.

Is it? Can it be?!

It is!

The Phenomenal One is here! AJ Styles!

Oh my God!

It has been rumored for weeks that the hottest free agent in sports entertainment was heading to WWE! Styles is here!

Former IWGP Champion, same as Brock Lesnar!

An 18-year veteran, a mastermind of offensive innovation.

A star around the world. Roman Reigns realizes what he faces now.

Much like Strowman did at the Greatest Royal Rumble, looking to dominate again here tonight and eliminate Seth Rollins, and get the matchup and the champion of his choice at WrestleMania.

Brock Lesnar or Daniel Bryan? [Strowman dumps Rollins over the top rope, but Rollins stands up on the apron, and headlocks Strowman]

Oh, oh... W-w-w-w-w-w-w-wait! Wait! Wait!

And now Seth Rollins, now trying to eliminate Strowman! Strowman in trouble; top rope! Rollins trying to wrestle him down to the floor!

Rollins has a death grip on his head!

[Rollins takes Strowman over the top rope, onto the apron] Strowman trying to hang on; both men are on the apron of the ring!

Ohh… [Rollins, still with a headlock on Strowman, is overpowered by Strowman who lifts Rollins onto his shoulders]

And again, the power of Strowman. Look at Strowman! [Rollins slips out] Rollins, though...

[Rollins pushes Strowman into the steel post] Whoa!

Posting Strowman! Strowman still on the apron.

[Rollins superkicks Strowman in the gut, taking Strowman down] Oh!

Rollins to the midsection!

One foot.

Strowman still staying alive! Rollins...

[Rollins Curb Stomps Strowman] OH! ACK!

[Strowman careens to the floor, winning Rollins the Rumble] SETH ROLLINS WINS!

OH MY GOD!

ROLLINS IS GOING TO WRESTLEMANIA!

Whoa-oh!

Here is your winner: Seth Rollins!

Seth Rollins is going to WrestleMania! Seth Rollins has won the Royal Rumble match!