Squirt quotes from Pound Puppies

Oh, what a relief. I was worried something bad happened to you.

Squirt

Something bad? Why, I oughta -- [sniffs] Oh, great. You and your big fat backside knocked the scent right out of my nose. Now, there's no way I can smell us to town.

Sorry.

Squirt

Whatever. Look, l-let's just stay put till tomorrow morning.

Okay.

Squirt

All we need to do is find some kind of shelter while we still got some moonlight.

Squirt

Why am I not surprised?

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Squirt

Bad luck is bad luck. You can't just wash it off with soap and water.

You know, I get why Niblet believes in all this hocus-pocus stuff. I mean, he refuses to eat out of the left side of his dish ever Tuesday, Friday, and third Monday.

That's so the magic flea angels won't get me.

But, you, Squirt -- I don't understand.

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Squirt

See? Everything the kid touches turns to wet kibble.

TTaboo

It's true, Mr. Lucky. I'm a jinx.

No, you're not. It was just a coincidence.

Dolly

A coincidence that ruined my perm.

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GMr. Geekman

He's more perfect than Pi. Oh, I can't wait to show him to all of the kids in my algebra class. For once, they'll see that their old math teacher's search for perfection has come to fruition. All I have to do now is ride home, tell the wife, and bring her back here to see her new pet.

(to Taboo) See? I told you it's not bad luck.

GMr. Geekman

Be sure to leave a little sign on the gate, Olaf! I don't want anybody to take that dog before I --

Olaf

Mr. Geekman!

Squirt

(sarcastically) Oh no, no. He's not bad luck at all.

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TTaboo

Ever since the day I was born. Hmm, I remember it like it was months ago.

Squirt

(deadpan) It was months ago.

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Squirt

We got to get rid of this walking handbag. He's a menace!

I thought you never met a mutt you didn't like.

Squirt

He ain't no mutt. He's an alligator.

An alligator who can talk!

Yeah. How'd you learn to do that, anyway?

RRover

Oh, you know, from other dogs, much like yourselves.

Squirt

Yeah, dogs you ate.

RRover

Not me. Oh, I'm a vegetarian.

Squirt

I don't care if you're a Presbyterian. You're not a pet like us.

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RRebound

That's not Agatha! She's a short old lady with gray hair and big, goofy glasses.

Squirt

You just described half the passengers on this ship.

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Squirt

Great, great, great. We're so deep in the woods that even a couple of squirrels can't find their way around.

I guess we really are lost.

Does this mean we have to start eating each other? 'Cause if we do, I pick Strudel.

Strudel

Ack!

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Squirt

Hold me back, Lucky, or I'll tear him limb from limb!

Oh sure. (Flatly) Don't do it, Squirt. He's not worth the trouble.

Squirt

Yeah, I suppose you're right. But if Sarge ever bad-mouths an innocent, young pup like that while I'm around, it's gonna take more than just Lucky to hold me back.

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Hey, Pepper.

Squirt

We're real sorry.

PPepper

It's all I ever wanted -- to do good, get the bad guys. Now I guess I'll have to settle for being some old lady's purse dog.

What?! I can't believe you're gonna let some uppity, establishment dog tell you what you can and cannot do.

PPepper

Sarge is the K9 commander. He must know what he's talking about.

Squirt

That guy? He doesn't know his haunches from his hind quarters.

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Squirt

So what's the deal? Do you think he got conked on the head with a coconut, and woke up thinking he was a dog?

Strudel

No, there are many much more plausible theories, why, I could spend all day narrowing down the possibilities...

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SSpotty

Oh, that's Mr. Nut Nut. He fell out of a tree and into our doggie bed when we were babies.

Squirt

Aha, just like a coconut!

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Of course! All she needs is a coach! (to Lucky) Like how you coached me from jumping in and ruining that nice folks' picnic. (to Zipper) I mean before you did.

A coach, now that's an idea, Niblet. But we don't really know any zoomit dogs.

Sure we do.