Constance Carmell quotes from Party Down

Constance

[in a low voice; imitating a cow] Mooooooo! You can milk me if you like. My tits are fuuuulll.

Kyle

Fucking intolerance blows! [Constance prepares to spit] Woah, what are we doing here?

Constance

I am going to spit on all the appetizers because I can't remember which ones he was eating.

Kyle

No, you know what: there's other things we can do than spitting.

Constance

Like what? [disappointed] I love spitting.

Henry, what is the craziest place that you ever made love?

Constance

Yeah.

Henry

...A bed.

Constance

What did he say?

Wow.

Constance

What did he say?

"A bed."

Constance

What did we ask him?

I don't know.

Constance

That's a leg?

Ron

Made footless! By pot.

Constance

Rick Fox, he's the guest speaker.

Roman

On what topic? How the wealth I made from my pituitary abnormality relates to your dipshit corporate hell?

Constance

I was once involved in a workplace romance. It kinda got out of hand. It was a sex explosion. It's really the only way I can describe it. We did it constantly, in vans, in bathrooms, in the bushes. It was non-stop sex.

Ron

Hello? Is this work?

Constance

This is work-related, Ron. We fucked in the sink. We fucked in the dinghy.