Mystery Science Theater 3000 · Season 6
“The Dead Talk Back (movie)” · Season 6
In this episode: Crow T. Robot (7), Tom Servo (7), Mike Nelson (6), Krasker (3)
[During a night scene illuminated by a single dim spot light:]
The first movie filmed entirely with flashlights.
C'mon, Merle! I only got two more D-cells left!
Probably blew their budget on those bongo players. I just said a lot of B's.
[As a driver tries unsuccessfully to start their car]
With 34 cylinders, the cars of yesteryear were impossible to flood.
She's flooding the radio.
[As a man in a trench coat runs towards the car]
And Creepy Triple-A is there.
Maybe this isn't my car.
Geez, not since Moonraker has there been an exciting opening sequence.
[Krasker introduces himself]
Have you been hearing some weird stories recently?
About Chuck Berry?
About telepathy?
I knew you were going to say that.
The fourth dimension?
Or Marilyn McCoo?
Or ghosts?
Hmm, no, it doesn't ring a bell. We must have the wrong movie.
The case that I'm working on at the present time involves a little of each.
Hang on a sec here, I've got this one thing.
Me?
You?
Who am I?
Frankly I've forgotten.
I'm a private investigator. Criminology is my hobby.
I sell parts of my record collection to make ends meet. I also manage a bowling alley... Oh, look, I'm kind of between projects at the moment. [softly] Mike, help me!
My philosophy?
Lots of leather.
Krasker; Metaphysics. What is metaphysics?
It's really hard.
There's a long, complicated explanation to that question.
[sarcastically] Which he'll be happy to give us.
Wouldn't it be fantastic... to be able to speak to someone who has just passed over?
Quit squirming.
Why just think! We could find lost articles...
Coupons!
Treasures... Gold mines...
You're not buying any of this, are you?
We could even solve murders... by just contacting the murdered.
I'm so lonely... [sobs]
[Krasker switches on his radio for talking to the dead:]
It takes a while for... temperature attunement.
Uh-huh...
Yeah.
Warming up.
Sure.
We'll try it again later.
Are you wearing corduroy? 'Cause that affects the radio, you know. You should also wash your hair a lot so the vibrations work.
This's gonna take a while; you wanna hang out? We could play air hockey, but we'd have to be kinda quiet 'cause my dad works third shift...
The problem of communicating with the... departed...
Is that they're dead.
[A large, full bookshelf stands against the far wall:]
Ya look at that? All the books Joyce Carol Oates published last month.
[After discarding a pair of shoes, a suspect drives off in a 1960's Volkswagen Bug:]
The heater never works in this thing. Starts well, though...
One thing about this getaway? Great gas mileage.
Zero to sixty... in about an hour.
[the horn that is part of Krasker's machine for the seance blares, startling Mike and the bots]
Oh, my ride's here!
Reneé('s spirit) must love Jesus.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Mystery Science Theater 3000 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
