I bet daily friendship with that bottle attracts more people to advertising than any salary you can dream of.
No, you're not. You don't know how to drink. Your whole generation, you drink for the wrong reasons. My generation, we drink because it's good, because it feels better than unbuttoning your collar, because we deserve it. We drink because it's what men do.
What about shaky hands, I see a lot of that with you boys?
No joke. Your kind with your gloomy thoughts and your worries, you're all busy licking some imaginary wound.
Maybe I'm not as comfortable being powerless as you are.
What you did is totally unacceptable.
I want you to be very clear about this: You were fired. I wanted you out. Cooper wanted you out. And you would be...if it weren't for this man. [motions to Don] He thought you deserved another chance. That's right. He fought for you.
I don't know what to say.
Say nothing. You are here because of Don Draper's largess.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
Now, I know that your generation went to college instead of serving, so I'll illuminate you. This man is your commanding officer. You live and die in his shadow. Understood?
[nods vigorously] I won't let you down, Don.
Jesus! Campbell...don't ever say that.
[Roger and Don meet with Bert Cooper, one of the agency's founding partners]
CCooper
I'm sorry to hear that.
Can't be avoided, I'm afraid.
CCooper
I wish I could agree with that.
He's a junior account executive who brought his own idea to a client, in a bar. There are rules.
CCooper
There are other rules.
CCooper
New York City is a marvelous machine filled with levers, and gears, like a fine watch, wound tight, always ticking.
CCooper
How much do you know about Pete's family?
Nothing, except they put out a mediocre product.
CCooper
His mother is Dorothy Dykeman Campbell. The Dykemans own pretty much everything north of 125th Street, which, I don't know how good your geography is, but that's a fair chunk of the island.
So they're rich. So what?
CCooper
Well, no. His grandfather dropped it all in '29; panicked. Some people have no confidence in this country.
What's your concern, then?
CCooper
Well, I don't want Dorothy Dykeman Campbell standing on the dock at Fisher's Island this summer, talking about how badly Sterling Cooper treated her son.
I don't think any of us want that.
CCooper
We lose him, we lose our entree to Buckley, Deak, the Maidstone Club, the Century Club, Dartmouth, Gracie Mansion sometimes. It's a marky issue for us. See my point?
Absolutely. He's more valuable to the agency than I am.
CCooper
Don't kid yourself; there's a Pete Campbell, at every agency out there.
Well, let's go get one of the other ones.
CCooper
You're going to need a stronger stomach if you're going to be back here in the kitchen seeing how the sausage is made.
I thought it was a big watch.
CCooper
You handle the words. You know how much we want you here with us.
No doubt about that. Don's a big boy, Bert. Aren't you, Don?
CCooper
There you go! I'm glad we're all better now.
RRoy
So, what do you do, Don?
RRoy
No way. Madison Avenue? What a gas!
We all have to serve somebody.
RRoy
Perpetuating the lie. How do you sleep at night?
RRoy
You hucksters in your tower created the religion of mass consumption.
People want to be told what to do so badly that they'll listen to anyone.
RRoy
When you say "people", I have a feeling you're talking about thou.
And I have a feeling that you spent more time on your hair this morning [points to Midge] than she did.
You ever been hunting, Peggy?
You either have or you haven't. I went a couple of times. With my uncle. New Hampshire.
POPeggy Olsen
I saw my cousin shoot a rabbit by Coney Island.
It's an incredible sensation. You have to be very quiet. Take it down with the first shot or you scare it away. Then sometimes you have to go up and finish it off. Then you tie it to the bumper and go home. But do you know what I've always wanted to do? I would pick it up, throw its back legs over my shoulder, and I would drag it through the snow to this little cabin. And there, I'd hang it up between a couple of trees, cut it open, and drain it, dress it. Then I'd take my big hunting knife and I'd cut this loin right out the side. And I'd go into the cabin and there'd be this woman waiting for me. Standing by one of those old stoves with a big black pipe. And I'd hand it to her and she'd put it in a cast iron skillet and then I'd sit at the table. And she'd bring it to me. And I'd wipe my knife on my knee. And then I would eat it. While she watches.
POPeggy Olsen
That would be wonderful.
MSMidge's Friend
Dig. Ad man's got a heart.
The grown-ups are talking.
MSMidge's Friend
Don't defend him. [to Don] Toothpaste doesn't solve anything. Dacron sure as hell won't bring back those ten dead kids in Biloxi.
Neither will buying some Tokaj wine and leaning up against a wall in Grand Central pretending you're a vagrant.
MSMidge's Friend
You know what it's like to watch all you ants go into your hive? I wipe my ass with the Wall Street Journal.
WWoman
How come every time we have a party the ladies have to sit and listen to the men talk?
MSMidge's Friend
Look at you. Satisfied, dreaming up jingles for soap flakes and spot remover, telling yourself you're free.
Oh, my God. Stop talking and make something of yourself.
RRoy
Like you? You make the lie. You invent want. You're for them... not us.
Well, I hate to break it to you, but there is no big lie. There is no system. The universe is indifferent.
