Trick quotes from Lost Girl

Trick

Fae! Clear the bar, please! Sanctuary has been invoked!

Trick

[looking around Bo and Kenzi's house] I've seen duck ponds with greater security. How are you still alive?

Trick

[about Tamsin's memory] Valkyries deal in the souls of the dead. They see so much carnage in one lifetime that sometimes they repress those memories in the next.

Trick

'He who lies in the mud rises dirty'.

Lauren

Less Gaelic wisdom, more looking for makeshift surgical tools.

Bo

Seems like a hell of a party.

Trick

No, it's not a party. It's La Shoshain.

La what now?

Trick

La Shoshain. It's the most sacred day of the year for Fae. I thought you should see it.

Kenzi

Seems like a party.

Trick

Well, it is that one time of the year where Light and Dark Fae can get up close and personal with each other, and some of them use it as an excuse to drink and- How can I put this delicately? Uh... fornicate across party lines.

Kenzi

So it is a party. I am really likin' this Fae Day.

Trick

It's not "Fae Day." It's-

La Shoshain.

Trick

Good. It's spiritual.

Kenzi

Sure thing, T-man. You got any Fae Day signature cocktails? 'Cause we're gonna take two.

Kenzi

Hit me with some hooch, T-Bag. T-Dawg? [cockney accent] Please, sir, may I have some beverage?

Trick

[take out a shot glass and bottle] Here. Help yourself. I'm busy.

Kenzi

[in a high-pitched voice] Oh, my God. It's like Christmas!

Trick

Sorry, bar's closed right now.

Think of me as a VIP. I do.

Kenzi

Look- Bo deserves una casa that has that fresh from the dentist feeling. But I am not genetically programmed for housework. And she doesn't earn enough moolah to get me the squadron of maids I deserve!

Trick

Well, if you want some spending money, I'll hire you on for some shifts.

Kenzi

Work for a living? Do I look like a chump?

Trick

Do I?

Kenzi

If I say yes, do I still get that beer?

I'm Mumphert.

Kenzi

I got a shot for that in kindergarten. Keep walkin', pal.

I'm a Brownie. I clean houses.

Kenzi

Before you... devour the inhabitants?

I try to stay out of the way. Mostly I work at night. So quiet. You won't even know I'm there. And I do it for free.

Kenzi

[quietly] Mumphey! Have a seat! [walks over to Trick and whispers] Brownies: perfectly harmless or lock-up-your-honeys?

Trick

They eat honey, not honeys. In fact, they like it in their porridge.

Kenzi

What else do they like in their porridge, huh? Nuggets of girl-brain?

Trick

No.

Kenzi

A drizzle of virgin blood?

Trick

No.

Kenzi

Eyeball dumplings?

Trick

All they eat is cereal and honey.

Kenzi

Okay, so what you're saying is, he is Trick-certified safe to take home?

Trick

Absolutely.

Trick

Every single snake at the zoo has disappeared.

Bo

Maybe they're on a plane?

Kenzi

Back when I got that rash from the Kitsune and she Kenzi-napped me and yadda yadda yadda... She told me that I could be Fae.

Trick

Did she now?

Kenzi

Which- Isn't really true. Is it?

Trick

What did Stella say to you? You looked upset.

Kenzi

She told me what happens to humans who are abandoned by the Fae who claimed them.

Trick

[sighs] You're not Bo's pet.

Kenzi

I'm not Fae either.

Trick

Bo's very strong. I have every hope and faith that she will emerge safely.

Kenzi

And if she doesn't?

Trick

Hale or Dyson could use someone to do chores around their house.

Kenzi

Don't play me, homie.

Trick

I suppose... If Bo weren't around anymore- I could claim you.

Kenzi

Get out.

Trick

Even though I have no right to, I've come to think of you as family, Kenzi. I hope you don't mind.

Kenzi

[smiles] Well, it's a little presumptuous but- if you must.

Trick

And for however long you want it, you have a place in my world. Our world. [Kenzi hugs him]