Capt. Ross quotes from Law & Order: Criminal Intent

Eames

Elaine said Carlo was old world, but he's ahead of my time.

Capt. Ross

He gets the culture Amanda's part of. Would she leave a guy like that at the altar?

Eames

My husband Joe, he was a cop. He gave me a taser gun once for our anniversary. Sometimes you want to be more than your job.

Capt. Ross

I take it Joe is an ex.

Eames

He died. 8 years ago.

Capt. Ross

Sorry.

Capt. Ross

[As Goren leaves the interview room] Good job, detectives. You can give me your paperwork--

Goren

[leaving] You can save it, alright? I'm leaving. You want to fire me, fire me. [He tosses his notebook on his desk on the way out the door.] I don't care.

Capt. Ross

His father had allergies, so you think Ernest Foley may be good for a double family murder 18 years apart?

Goren

Yeah, that's one-one one theory - has anybody ever told you you're reductive?

Capt. Ross

My ex-wife.

Eames

I checked her PDA. Found his cell number. When you call it, Diego directs you to a web site because, as he says, "seeing is believing."

Capt. Ross

You're kidding. "Rent this hunk. Diego. By the hour or by the night. Muscular, tanned, relentless--"

Goren

[watching Ross with interest] We can all read, Captain.

Capt. Ross

We've been ordered off.

Logan

By who? The Feds, or Israel? On this one, are you a Jew first and a cop second? Is that the story?

Capt. Ross

[angry but controlled] We're done here, Logan. There are good guys and there are bad guys here. We're dealing with car bombs, terrorists. Hamas, PLO - they blow people up, in shopping malls, cafes, buses.

Logan

Come on! You really think Sarah Mier is the first innocent the Israelis have killed?

Wheeler

[placating] Captain. Logan.

Capt. Ross

Thank you for your help, detectives. We're off this case.

This is why I never wear makeup in space, not even an earring.

I think she looks just fine, don't you, Houston?

Capt. Ross

Let me guess, this is where her heart rate went up.

Capt. Ross

At the very least, she's a hyper-competitive Type A personality under enormous pressure.

Goren

So am I. So are you.

Wheeler

James Edward Holland fathered a baby 10 years after his death.

Capt. Ross

The rich really are different.

Goren

As serial killers go, this Mark Ford Brady is definitely within the hashmarks.

Capt. Ross

Right down to having three names.

Capt. Ross

[about Brady] He's toying with you. Now, you're personally invested. He's got you exactly where he can control you.

Goren

No, he's not in control of me. I can handle him.

Capt. Ross

No. You don't need this in your life right now.

Goren

You don't know what I need. And don't tell me who I am. You don't know who I am. And don't tell me how I think.

Capt. Ross

Then I'll just tell you this: You're off this case.

Capt. Ross

[about the victim, whom Logan briefly dated] How well did you know her?

Logan

We took a ride in an old convertible once.

Capt. Ross

How're things working out with you two?

Logan

Workin'.

Capt. Ross

Falacci's not really a… people person.

Logan

Yeah. But she's a closer. Besides, I wanna take a shot at being the diplomat for once.

The hotel clerk doesn't remember who signed the register, but she took one look at Gerry's photo and said she's positive it wasn't him.

Capt. Ross

Because of his weight or his race?

Both. Their clientele is all, [in a breathy voice] "Anorexic models and Eurotrash named 'Serge.'"

Capt. Ross

[about removing the judge from the crime scene] You made the right call, detective, but this isn't Brooklyn North, this is Major Case. You're dealing with a higher class of criminal.

What are you saying, I should give him the run of the place?

Capt. Ross

[long pause] There's a protocol.....

When you secure a crime scene, really?

Capt. Ross

There's also a protocol with me, detective!

Logan

You don't drag a senior ADA into the station house.

You do if he's stonewalling!

Capt. Ross

Which is what happens when people throw stones.