Alexandra Eames quotes from Law & Order: Criminal Intent

She engaged in reckless and inappropriate behavior.

Eames

I think we know what that means.

Goren

I'm just checking which ones are fresh.

Eames

They must love you in the produce section.

Do you recognize it, Detective Eames?

Eames

Yes. It's a letter I wrote to my superior officer five years ago.

Please summarize the contents.

Eames

It's a request for a new partner, but I withdrew my request.

Please read the highlighted passage.

Eames

"Detective Goren's erratic and antisocial behavior, his volatile and bizarre interrogation techniques, lead me to have seroius doubts about his judgment and his mental stability--" I want to explain.

Thank you. No more questions.

Carver

Redirect, your honor. Detective Eames, please explain why you withdrew your request.

Eames

I was used to working with more conventional detectives. Detective Goren's style is definitely unique and an acquired taste. Over time I came to see that his approach was based on a deep understanding of human behavior. I came to appreciate him as an ethical person, and an effective police officer.

Carver

Thank you. No further questions.

Eames

I'm sorry, Bobby. I should have told you.

Goren

I am an acquired taste. I'm lucky you withdrew your letter.

Eames

[about Boatman] Everyone told us he wouldn't harm a fly. Torture changed him.

Goren

Evil changes everyone.

Eames

Have you heard from her lately?

Nicole is a fugitive, thanks to you two. And, no, she'd never put me in that kind of danger. She's very protective.

Goren

Well, you'd be very proud of your star pupil.

I can't take the credit. She's a natural.

Goren

Well, she's very adept at poisons. Is that something that you taught her?

I'll take a pass on that.

What are we talking about, some kind of Manson family?

Eames

If the Manson family shopped on Madison Avenue.

Professor Lewis

This story of yours is - it's Kafkaesque.

Eames

That would make you the bug, Larry. You know what I like to do to bugs? I like to watch my partner squash them.

[in Chinese] You speak Chinese like my little dog!

She said...

Goren

[embarrassed] I know, I got it.

Eames

[amused] So did I.

Woo-hoo! Look at that!

Goren

You like car races?

Oh yeah! I got a need for speed! I'm– not that I break the law any more, officer. I got plenty enough tickets to last me a lifetime, but no DUI's. I don't drink. I got an allergy.

Goren

Your job. You're always climbing around in those vents, that's dangerous, huh?

It's fun!

Goren

Dangerous and fun.

Eames

[deadpan] Woo hoo.

You're sick! You're sick! [storms out]

Eames

[bored shrug] So we're sick.

Eames

[to Goren, privately] I'm supposed to keep an eye on you.

Goren

Let me know if I can help.

Capt. Ross

That's half-clever, which is about right for a trophy husband.

Eames

Some trophy. He marries Kelly Sloane and then cheats on her.

Capt. Ross

A man marries a model, he's not looking for a soul mate.

Where's Bobby? He believes me.

Eames

He does, I don't. You ask me, you made the whole thing up.

That's crazy!

Eames

You said it.

Back home in our civvies? I wouldn't tolerate an affair. But when Amanda's in uniform, she's a soldier first.

Eames

And soldiers have sex with each other.

It has nothing to do with the real world.