GGallagher
[having gotten a description from a tipsy couple] The killer was a tall, short guy. Somewhere between a 110 and 250 pounds. One eye brown, one blue and the third one green.
S1 E4Knockover
JGJoannie Garrity
Where'd the dress come from?
Property. It was evidence in a wife-beating case. I don't know if she wouldn't put it on or wouldn't take it off. Women are funny.
It'll be morning in an hour. Before that, one of you is gonna start chirping. Did I say one of you? I'm gonna have a room full of canaries.
[holding a photograph of Leona and a man hiding behind a menu] Look at the john. He's being so bashful. I wonder why? Terminal acne, maybe?
[takes the photograph] Well, married men are sometimes camera-shy, have you noticed?
Frequently. Can you make out the name on the menu?
No, but then I can't even read the top line on an eye chart anymore.
Tell me about it.
Como estais, amigo? Como estais?
DGDet. Gomez
Muy bien. That's pretty good, lieutenant. You know, what you ought to do is get yourself a nice Spanish-speaking girl. It'll help you with the important words.
Hey, take it from me, sonny, for the important things you don't need words.
S1 E5Girl in the River
[to Crocker] Hey look, I know you haven't slept in a couple of nights, okay, but you stick with it. We gotta get this jellybean off the streets before he empties them.
CCDetective 'Chic' Chiccaloni
Tell me about this man that threatened you.
EEloise
Oh, he didn't threaten me, Eric just over-reacted.
EEric
No, he threatened! I heard. That was a bona fide death threat!
EEloise
Well, you could say he technically threatened me, but actually, he's a very gentle man. A vegetarian.
EEric
You're too trusting, Eloise. she's too trusting. A vegetarian, okay, but so is a gorilla!
EEric
I can't call Eloise off a massage. A massage is like music, you know? You get it going, you gotta keep it going.
CCDetective 'Chic' Chiccaloni
You keep it going while I talk to her, okay?
You know, any man that can put so much violence and sex into a piece of stone, he doesn't have to violate flesh. He gets his kicks with his hammer and chisel.
The Commissioner's gonna violate you with a hammer and chisel if we don't tie a can on this.
[the Excalibur killer has been caught, but Kojak thinks he's a phony] Oh, you didn't see him, Mac. He looked like yesterday's newspaper puy in a garbage can and thrown away. The only way a guy like that can get into a singles bar is with a cannon.
S1 E6Requiem for a Cop
Broen, come on. You'd bust your mother's arm in three places if she lost a subway token.
BBroen
Your jokes are getting stale, Kojak. You need a fall guy. Don't go poking in my garbage. I'm alibied.
I know, you were out dedicating an orphanage, right?
Wait a minute, Lieutenant, what is this? I'm not Donnelly's partner, Alessi is.
The hell you're not! When one man in this precinct comes under suspicion, the entire unit becomes Donnelly's partner. Now look, we got two days to polish his badge and ours. Because on Wednesday, the Internal Affairs shooflies, they're gonna be all over us like a groom on a honeymoon. And let me tell you something: we all better be virgins or have a pretty good story.
Close the door. I want a tail put on Geno. I want to know who he talks to; I want to know where he goes; I want to know where he is every minute. The same kind of surveillance you give any other homicide suspect.
SASgt. Al Vine
Theo, not Geno. I mean, you can't possibly believe...
Do you think I want to believe it? But if Donnelly wasn't on the pad, then somebody set him up. And right now, I've got a very narrow field to pick from.
I want the tax returns and bank statements on Donnelly for the past two years.
Lieutenant, it's Sunday.
Well, you make believe it's Friday! And have somebody at the bank agree with you.
Right on.
[to Geno] Well, you and Tom Donnelly have been partners for 12 years. I mean he'd eat a knish and you'd get heartburn.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Kojak pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.