Mary Test quotes from Johnny Test

And two, we're working on a new invention that will surely get [Lovely] Gil next door, over for tea.

It's good, but if we let him go, we could get arrested.

You get the door, I'll get the lever. [Goes for the lever.]

Bumper

So I get to beat up Test and you guys won't call my mom?

Beat away.

Bumper

Awesome! [he runs off to beat up Johnny]

[sprays gas at Bumper] Awesome!

Hugh

Johnny! You are in big trouble mister, and you look ridiculous and- [Johnny sprays gas on him to make him hush]

[walks up to Johnny] Okay, let's go get that $10,000.

Now The Caveman is mad and he's getting his club. And that means Stinkin' Johnny is gonna get it too! [laughs] Nothing can save Stinkin' Johnny now.

Hugh

[comes in angrily dressed as the Cagin' Mad Dad] STOP RIGHT THERE!

Dad?

Except for the Cagin' Mad Dad!

Hugh

Now that is my son and although he's in big trouble. You'll be in more if you lay 1 hand- [The Caveman throws him out and he lands on Dukey's back] Ooh, soft landing! AND YOU'LL ALL BE IN BIG TROUBLE!

[worried] But not as much as Johnny!

Hey, now! If you could just put me down so I could go home and forget this whole-

Uh-huh!

Yeah, I didn't think so.

And the madness continues as the Caveman must now take the OVERPROTECTIVE MOM!

Lila

Don't you dare lay a finger on that boy!

Ooh! [he laughs as he presses Johnny's costume, then Lila grabs his arm and throws him on the floor 3 times]

And The Caveman is down for a triple way! [Lila jumps on The Caveman's back] And the body slam! Rope dive!

Hugh

You see girls? That's why I never upset your mother.

[as Lila finishes off to defeat The Caveman] UNBELIEVABLE! The Caveman is coming back to 1 last attack.

Hugh

Oh, he really shouldn't do that.

And the Overprotective Mom wins!

[satisfied; after his mom saved him] You were awesome! You were amazing! And you're gonna punish me, right?

Lila

Oh, big time.

Susan

Well, the bad news is mom and dad kept the $10,000.

But the good news is they bought a new HDTV with it.

Which I can't watch for a month 'cause I'm grounded from TV.

And us from the lab.

Right, so let's play some ball! [he throws the baseball to Johnny which causes him to break the new HDTV] That was the TV.

[counting by his fingers] 3, 2, 1.

[offscreen; angrily] JOHNNY!!!

You wouldn't last a day in my shoes.

Hugh

YOU COULDN'T LAST AN HOUR IN MINE!!!!!

We can arrange that.

I need a new bike.

Hugh

What happened to your old bike?

First, we test to jump with these look-like dummies, then calculate the speed and trajectory will need to make the jump for real!

It's genius!

Uh... it got stolen?

Hugh

Hm?

(Dramatic) Why, dad, why did it have to get stolen?

Hugh

I'll get you a new bike for your birthday. (Johnny looks overjoyed) Which is seven months away.

(Angrily flails his arms) YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!

Hugh

I do love you, son, and I will always love and accept you for who you are your entire life.

I don't know what that means.

Hugh

It means you're not getting a new bike until your birthday.

DARN IT!!

Hi, Mr. Test, would you like to buy some ladybird scout cookies?

Hugh

No, because I'm... I believe the lady bird scouts have lost their way and have become nothing but a door to door cookie company using free labor, and although I like you sissy, I can no longer buy these cookies. (Walks away)

Your dad is weird.

Yeah, I know. (Johnny & Sissy look at each other) You look dumb.

Do you want to buy some cookies, Test?

Oh wow, ladybird scout cookies, they look so good and... No. (Dukey hits Johnny) Ow!

I mean, give me a box of Wow! Wow! Chocolate Chunkies. (Dukey hits Johnny then shakes his head "no") Ow, Coconut Dribblers?

Hm!

Lemon Buckwalt? (Dukey groans while shaking his head "no" yet again. Johnny takes the blue box of cookies) Butter Scotch Blah Blas?

Yes! Only 999 boxes to go.

To go for what?

When you sell lady bird scout cookies, (Sissy opens a blue folder attached on her clipboard and it reveals prizes depending on the boxes of cookies sold) you can win prizes like backpacks, pen sets, and if you sell a thousand boxes, you get new bike.

Stop!

Susan

Sit. (Wentworth sits down) Good boy. (Gives Wentworth steak. Wentworth eats the steak) What do you want this time, little brother? A lerinx transplant so you can sing like a rockstar?

Or a DNA adjustment that will make your tongue taste like bubble gum?

No, we need your old ladybird scout uniforms.

Susan

That's a new one.

Now all we have to do is sell 1,000 boxes of this crud, and zoom, we're in brand new bike city!

And here comes our first customer.

And with all those side effects swimming around in that monster, there's no telling what that thing will do!

[furious] There's plenty of telling what that thing will do! It will do what all your experiments do - destroy the town! Because you are all INSANE!!!

[in unison] No, we're adventurous. There's a huge difference.

Susan

People go looney when they get power.

It happened to George III, Henry VIII and Napoleon. And he was short and crazy just like you.

Susan

You'll get the power, enjoy it way too much and try and take over Europe. So forget it!

Europe? I'm not gonna take over Europe today.

Attention, crazy person!

Come out with your royal hands up or massive force will be... used... on... you...

Oh, for the love of... is that Johnny in there?

Yep.

Why can't you guys be like normal kids and play board games?

That's kind of what we're doing. (Laughs.)

You think you can stop me?! The king with your blasters?!

Actually we're gonna use the turbo soaker. Check and mate!

Who? What? Where? What happened?

You went crazy with the King Madness and took over the Toy Castle.

Did we have fun?

We had a blast!

You know needles freak me out!

We could give you a suppository.

What's that? [Mary whispers something in Johnny's ear.] Are you nuts?!

Hey, let's all laugh now like they do at the end of old sitcoms.

Ok!

Susan

The Theme-O'meter utilizes harmonic sequencing combined with brainwave alteration to evoke various cinematic atmospheres.

Can I get a science to English translation?

It's melodic frequencies adjust brain perception to create various filmic styles within reality.

Can I get an English to Johnny translation?

Susan

It makes real life just like a movie.