Alberta Haynes quotes from Ghosts

Thorfinn

You just drink alcohol even though no idea who gave it to you.

Alberta

And you just traipsed through a field wearing a metal helmet during a lightning storm? What's your point, Thor? We all got here somehow.

Alberta

But why would he want to kill me? I didn't even know the man.

Thorfinn

Actually, much harder to kill person you know. Sometimes not even fun.

Jay

I'm tired and my hands hurt.

Samantha

Yeah, sorry I couldn't find that second shovel, Jay.

Alberta

You threw it behind the shed, Sam.

Alberta

I guess your spell didn't work after all.

Patience

No matter. I still got the blood thing. Why don't you go hum about it?

Alberta

Sam, you should do audition.

Samantha

No. This isn't some Rinky Dink production. They performed at the mall.

Alberta

Pete's inside of Jay.

Isaac

We have a double possession.

Isaac

I recently learned there's such a thing called bacteria, which are like little men that live on the leaves and punch your stomach from the inside.

Alberta

We still followin' laws this fool made.

Isaac

You two getting back together would be a disaster on the scale of the Sugar Act, which was very bad.

Alberta

Aww, did they make you pay tax on sugar?

Isaac

And molasses, which we used in many products. It was a grave injustice.

Alberta

Yes, the 18th century was very difficult for white male landowners.

Isaac

Thank you.

Alberta

Danes are people too, Thor.

Elias

She's not wrong... In the eyes of hell, all nationalities are seen as equal. I was surprised, too!

Sasappis

What if it's because it's St. Patrick's Day, and you're Irish?

Hetty

Interesting. But then why has this never happened before?

Alberta

Maybe because you never saw the Irish as people before? But now that you do, you can also be seen?

Alberta

Thor, you jumped behind me when that guy pulled out a ghost gun?

Hetty

It was really quite pitiful.

Samantha

I face-palmed him immediately

Alberta

OK, why is that everyone's move suddenly?

Thorfinn

You start it.

Alberta

Oh, right.