Samantha Arondekar quotes from Ghosts

Samantha

Has anyone ever talked to the basement ghosts about what they saw that night?

Hetty

I'll be honest, I didn't know until very recently that they could speak.

Pete

How much was the advance?

$20,000.

Isaac

My God, you could buy Delaware!

Samantha

The library is empty!

Jay

I can't see ghosts. I don't know why I went in there!

Jay

Oh, my god. Is this wedding over yet?

Samantha

One second, Jay.

Jay

I'm tired and my hands hurt.

Samantha

Yeah, sorry I couldn't find that second shovel, Jay.

Alberta

You threw it behind the shed, Sam.

Samantha

They're back!

Jay

Nice! You see sometimes this ghost stuff just resolves itself. That's a good lesson for the future.

Samantha

If I were kidnapped and trapped in an underground lair, would you risk eternity in the dirt for the chance to save me?

Jay

Of course! And I love that these are our hypotheticals.

Samantha

But Jay, I love Halloween! Don't you think you're overreacting a little bit?

Jay

I wanted to wear my Atari shirt today. Do you know why I'm not wearing my Atari shirt today, Sam? Because the wall blood wouldn't come out of it.

Alberta

Sam, you should do audition.

Samantha

No. This isn't some Rinky Dink production. They performed at the mall.

Jay

So there's just some hot, invisible Australian guy hanging around now?... Are you blushing?

Samantha

No!

Jay

Man, it's harder to say no to them when you can see them and hear them.

Samantha

This is what I've been telling you.

Samantha

I face-palmed him immediately

Alberta

OK, why is that everyone's move suddenly?

Thorfinn

You start it.

Alberta

Oh, right.

Jay

Alright, let's go to the zoo!

Samantha

No, I made that up. I just wanted to have a private conversation without the ghosts hearing us.

Jay

So no zoo? Ah man, I really wanted some Dip'n'Dots.

Jay

[Isaac]'s gonna be so bummed. Which I can relate to as a man who thought he was gonna see tigers today.

Samantha

Oh, my.

Hetty

Yes, embrace the opulence.

Isaac

Ooh.

Samantha

Wow!