Isaac Higgintoot quotes from Ghosts

Hetty

You should've thought of that before you traded your soul to save some snot-nosed urchin.

Isaac

She never was much of a little kid person.

Hetty

Well, that's nonsense, I employed hundreds of them.

Pete

How much was the advance?

$20,000.

Isaac

My God, you could buy Delaware!

Pete

Wow, you guys did not have a lot to do back then.

Isaac

Other than invent democracy?

Sasappis

Ahem.

Isaac

Amongst Europeans?

Isaac

Who wouldn't enjoy staring at the gorgeous porcelain skin?

Patience

'Tis from the blood letting that killed me.

Sasappis

You were literally just saying that if we got out of there you would turn over a new leaf and be a better person. Here's your chance.

Isaac

Yes, well, perhaps we could start with something smaller? I could compliment one of Samantha's dreadful sweaters! [turns to Sam] That looks...lovely.

Isaac

Do you have to wallow in the one room with the TV?

Flower

How's everything going with your being-a-better-person thing?

Isaac

Really well, thank you for asking.

Hetty

It says "For Ages 5 & Up".

Isaac

Yes. 5 & Up.

Alberta

Pete's inside of Jay.

Isaac

We have a double possession.

Hetty

Huzzah!

Isaac

Huzzah!

Isaac

I recently learned there's such a thing called bacteria, which are like little men that live on the leaves and punch your stomach from the inside.

Alberta

We still followin' laws this fool made.

Isaac

You two getting back together would be a disaster on the scale of the Sugar Act, which was very bad.

Alberta

Aww, did they make you pay tax on sugar?

Isaac

And molasses, which we used in many products. It was a grave injustice.

Alberta

Yes, the 18th century was very difficult for white male landowners.

Isaac

Thank you.

Jay

My sister personally responds to all negative reviews, and she studied creative writing at Penn.

Sasappis

State.

Isaac

Altoona campus.

Thorfinn

Did not graduate.

Isaac

The year is 1776.

Flower

Really?!

Isaac

No, in the story.

Flower

Is that a bird?

Hetty

It's a plane!

Isaac

No. It's a stripper!

Hi, I'm Kyle.

Jay

Hi, Kyle, welcome to Woodstone.

Thorfinn

Kyle is dumb name.

Isaac

Well, it matches his dumb back purse.

Yeah, well, at least I'm alive.