George of the Jungle · 37 quotesGGeorge
Girls, Clementine is bad! She eats trees, and spits cheese! I made a rhymey-thingy!
S1 Beetle Invasion
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Lines by George 6
[George runs through the jungle]
GGeorge
George needs a new loincloth!
[George runs past a marmoset, who becomes mortified upon seeing the jungle man naked, and faints. George goes behind a bush, finds some leaves, and fashions himself some pants made out of them. Suddenly, a crunching noise is heard]
GGeorge
[Confused] Did the jungle just get... colder?
[A giraffe is eating George's pants. Both the giraffe and George look down and scream. After George runs away, the giraffe spits out the leaves, squirts toothpaste on his teeth, and frantically brushes]
GGeorge
ANT HILL!!!
[George and all the animals with a rash are performing a Broadway-style musical]
GGeorge
Got an itch right here
On my derriere
And my scratchin' finger is oh-so near
GGeorge
[Dressed like Don Quixote, scratching his back against a windmill's blades]
To scratch
The impossible itch
GGeorge
Who wants eggnog?!
S1 The Goat of Christmas Presents
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Scenes with George 20
[George has lost his loincloth; Dr. Towel Scott and Witch Doctor are laughing at him]
George... You're... au natural.
GGeorge
Yes, George is a natural rescuer.
No, no! I mean... you are... buck naked! [Laughs with Witch Doctor]
GGeorge
[Thinking Dr. Scott called him a different name] No, I'm George. You know, [sings the theme tune] "of the Jungle". [Laughs]
[Dr. Towel Scott and Witch Doctor laugh some more at George]
WDWitch Doctor
You lo... [laughs] lost your loincloth!
[George looks down, screams, and runs off as Dr. Towel Scott and Witch Doctor keep laughing]
[George finds an abandoned fog-infested camp. He finds some explorer's clothes hanging on a clothesline]
GGeorge
Yes! Clothes! Beautiful clothes!
[George removes the clothes off the clothesline and puts them on]
GGeorge
Why not?
[An explorer finds George]
EExplorer
I say, Dr. Livingood, what a relief to finally find you!
GGeorge
Oh, no, no. George's name is George.
EExplorer
And after eight long months of searching!
[George stares at the explorer, confused]
GGeorge
[Slowly] George.
EExplorer
Oh, a terrible journey! Storms at sea, pirates, cannibals, pirate cannibals! Oh! I would have found you, too, if I hadn't fallen into that hole. [Points to a deep hole in the ground]
GGeorge
[Looks down the hole] You fell down there?
EExplorer
And I never came out! Bad luck that day.
GGeorge
Wait... If you're... [points down the hole] there... but you're also... [pokes the explorer's nose] here... But that means you're a... a...
EExplorer
[Transforms into a ghost with the appearance of a skeleton in explorer's clothing] A... ghoooooooooooost! [laughs evilly]
GGeorge
Right. So, if you're a...
EExplorer
A ghost! [Flies around George, laughing evilly again; his laughter dies down as he realizes George isn't scared]
GGeorge
And I'm wearing your clothes...
EExplorer
[Confused] Uh... Boo?
GGeorge
Then I must be wearing... [realizes in horror] GHOST PANTS!!!
[One by one, the clothes on George start disappearing. George tries to use the hat to cover himself up, but it was no use. George, now naked again, gasps in horror. The ghost's jaw drops, he screams like a girl, and retreats into the hole]
GGeorge
Smell is heading for the river! But it doesn't know the shortcut! Follow George!
If it touches that water, it'll be... Aromageddon.
And that's bad, right?
Very! Imagine all the water in the jungle tasting like... Dirty George!
MUMagnolia, Ursula, and Ape
[Gasp] We're doomed!
[They all glare at George, who giggles nervously.]
WDWitch Doctor
[Coughs] Not necessarily.
My perfume!
WDWitch Doctor
I've increased the sweetness and purity by a power of Boogity 11.
[Angrily] There is no such number as Boogity 11, you bone-shaking troglodyte!
S1 Aromageddon
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[George and Ape are having dinner in Big Mitch's temple. Ape is sitting grumpily]
GGeorge
[Loudly] Ape is mad, right? Because George traded our house?
[Ape hits his plate with his knife.]
GGeorge
Yeah. George can tell.
Pass the salt, please.
[George pushes the salt shaker across the table, but it is bombarded by booby traps, reducing the salt shaker to ash by the time it reaches Ape]
GGeorge
Sorry!
"No takebacks"? Do you know what this means?
GGeorge
Uh...
It means we can never go home again. What have you done, George?
GGeorge
Me?! Well, this is all Ape's fault!
How is it my fault?
GGeorge
[Raises his finger, about to say something, but then looks around, confused] Somehow!
It's a good thing this is a big temple, because I don't wanna talk to you right now!
GGeorge
We'll talk later, then?
[George is in Egypt, talking to a monkey sitting on a camel]
GGeorge
And I'll give you all this in exchange for... Egypt!
MMonkey
Hmm... [hands George the deed to Egypt] Deal!
GGeorge
[Gasps excitedly]
There's no way Mitch won't give us our house back in exchange for all of Egypt. [Ape turns around] Right, George? [He sees George isn't here; ice cubes jingling and pouring is heard] George?
[Much to his horror, Ape sees George at a monkey's lemonade stand, trading the deed to Egypt for lemonade]
GEORGE, WAIT!
[Ape runs up to George as he drinks his lemonade]
George! Did you just trade the nation of Egypt for a glass of lemonade?!
GGeorge
[Nervously] Uh... Sort of?
[Offscreen, Ape hits George so hard, he is sent flying and screaming out of Egypt and back into the jungle]
[Growls] I never get this angry.
I don't get tired of new shoes as fast as I'm gettin' tired of Cousin Larry.
GGeorge
Shhh. Larry's winning sleeping contest.
[Larry is sleeping on George's back]
LLarry
[Snores] Win. [Snores] Win.
George, we hate to say this, but...
UAUrsula, Ape, and Magnolia
Cousin Larry has to go!
GGeorge
Shhh! We can't kick out George's family!
Yes, we can. In fact, let's have a contest to see how far out we can kick him.
GGeorge
But Larry gave us the picnic!
Don't you see? He's a win-a-holic! He only picks games he can't lose!
I hate to say this, George, but I'm in complete agreement.
GGeorge
Ha! Ha! See?
No, George, with Magnolia.
GGeorge
Boy. Ape changes mind pretty quick.
I always agreed with Magnolia. I don't like him.
None of us do.
Also, we believe he cheats.
[George gasps and gets up, causing Larry to fall off his back, making him sleep on the floor]
GGeorge
[Indignant] George will sit on forgetting rock now, until he forgets what Ape just said! [Walks off]
LLarry
[Snores] Win.
[George leaves the treehouse, but comes back seconds later]
GGeorge
I forget. Where is forgetting rock?
So, George sat upon the forgetting rock, and he forgot. He forgot, and forgot, until he couldn't remember what he was forgetting.
[George hears heavy breathing behind him. He sees two large yetis standing behind him. One of them roars at George]
GGeorge
Hmm. Big hairy beast is growling, but George forgets what he's supposed to do. Oh, yeah. [Screams]
[The yeti grabs George by the arm and shows him a photograph of Larry]
Y1Yeti #1
Have you seen this guy anywhere?
GGeorge
George's cousin Larry, yeah. He's staying with me and Ape, but Ape was mean to him. [Realizes] Uh-oh. George was supposed to forget that! Forget... [the yetis pick George up, causing him to scream]
Y2Yeti #2
Beat Larry! Beat Larry!
GGeorge
Hey, wait! George won't let you hurt Larry!
[The yetis put George down]
Y1Yeti #1
We won't hurt Larry. We yeti are scary, but peaceful creatures. We do not fight with our fists. We fight by eating pies. You see, we yeti take great pride in our pie-eating, and each spring, we win our annual pie-gobbling hoedown. For centuries, yetis have won. This year, we were robbed! We are absolutely convinced that Larry cheated at...
GGeorge
Yeah?
Y1Yeti #1
Uh... I forgot.
[At the pie-eating contest...]
George, I didn't want to tell you this, because I didn't think you'd believe me. Larry made a bet that you would lose.
GGeorge
What?
[Ape points up at Larry sitting in the bleachers, happily eating a pie]
GGeorge
Larry not sick! Larry... cheating?
I bet my room in the treehouse that you can do without cheating, while he can only do with fake stomachs and pie-eating dogs in his pants. I believe in you, George.
GGeorge
George won't let Ape down. For once, George going to beat lying, cheating, faking Larry. LET'S DO THIS!!!
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