Lester Nygaard quotes from Fargo

Lester Nygaard

You know, you can go through your whole life without a care, and one day it all changes. People die. They lose their homes. They go to prison. It's calamity, huh? I know it, 'cause I lived it. And if this year has taught me anything-- and believe me, I've seen it all-- it's that the worst does happen. And you need to be insured.

Lorne Malvo

Mister, we're not friends. I mean, maybe we will be someday. But I gotta say, if that were me in your position? I would have killed that man.

Lester Nygaard

Well, now... Come on.

Lorne Malvo

You said he bullied you in high school, right?

Lester Nygaard

Four years. Gave me an ulcer. You know what, one time, he put me in an oil barrel and rolled me in the road.

Lorne Malvo

Seriously? And now he tells you that he had relations with your wife. He bullies you again in front of his children. This is a man who doesn't deserve to draw breath.

Lester Nygaard

Yeah, okay, but, uh - Here's the thing -

Lorne Malvo

No. That is the thing.

Lester Nygaard

Well, heck! I mean, oh, okay.

Lorne Malvo

Okay.

Lester Nygaard

But... What am I supposed to do? Heck, you're so sure about it, maybe you should just kill him for me.

Lorne Malvo

Your problem is you spent your whole life thinking there are rules. There aren't. We used to be gorillas. All we had is what we could take and defend. The truth is, you're more of a man today than you were yesterday.

Lester Nygaard

How do you figure?

Lorne Malvo

It's a red tide, Lester, this life of ours. The shit they make us eat day after day, the boss, the wife, et cetera, wearing us down. If you don't stand up to it, let 'em know you're still an ape deep down where it counts, you're just gonna get washed away.

Now here I am, stuck in the Yukon with my two mongoloid sons.

Lester Nygaard

Oh, they're not so bad.

I've taken shits I want to live with more than them.

Lester Nygaard

You have gotta stand by me here.

You've been a burden my whole life. I'm done. There's something wrong with you, Lester. There's-- there's something missing. You're not right in the world.

Lester Nygaard

MY WIFE IS DEAD! And there are arrangements to see to. So you can either lock me up or let me go.

Molly Solverson

[on Lorne Malvo] He's not gonna stop. You know that. A man like that... maybe not even a man.

Lester Nygaard

You know, I'm not sure what you've had against me since day one. But I'm not the person you think I am, this, this kind of monster.

Molly Solverson

There was a fella once. Running for a train. And he's carrying a pair of gloves, this man. And he loses a glove on the platform. But he doesn't notice. And then later on, he's on the train sitting by the window, and he realises that he's just got this one glove left. But the train's already started pulling out of the station. So what does he do? He opens the window and he drops the other glove on to the platform. Now whoever finds the first glove can just have the pair.

Lester Nygaard

So, what are you telling me?

Molly Solverson

Goodbye, Mr. Nygaard.

Lester Nygaard

Goodbye, Deputy.