Dot Lyon quotes from Fargo

Dot Lyon

[dropping her Minnesota accent] Listen, bitch. I've climbed through six kinds of hell to get where I am and no Ivy League royal wannabe is gonna run me off just because she doesn't like the way I smell. If you want to tussle with me, you better sleep with both eyes open because nobody takes what's mine and lives. [bringing back her Minnesota accent] Anyhoo! Thanks for stopping by. Dinner Sunday? I'll bring my blue salad.

Dot Lyon

They never hit you when it's going their way, y'know? It's when they're weak and just pretending to be strong. When they need something small to climb on to feel big.

Dot Lyon

It got worse after that. He'd beat Linda every night and then come to me smelling like sweat and cigarettes. And then she was gone. Packed a bag, Roy said, and left in the wee hours. But he wasn't sad, he said, because he had me and what we had was true love. And then I was his puppet.

Indira Olmstead

What's the world coming to is all I'm saying. Neighbor against neighbor.

Dot Lyon

That...I agree with you there. We were just trying, me and my girl, to get out. School board meeting, my A-S-S. And then Mr. Abernathy, the math teacher, he came at me like something from a zombie movie. Which, don't come at a mama lion when she's got her cub. You know what I mean? But the officer, that...He was just wrong place, wrong time.

Indira Olmstead

Well, here's what I know. It's a beautiful day. And you know what they call a herd of lions? A pride. So think about that.

Lorraine Lyon

What were you doing there in the first place?

Dot Lyon

I mean, it was a school board meeting. I'm on the committee for the new library. We're trying to raise money to expand thrillers and mysteries. Lee Child and the like.

Lorraine Lyon

Can't you just give money like a normal person?

Could you take me to a veterinarian?

Ole Munch

What?

You know, like in the movies 'cause they're also a doctor, just for animals.

Dot Lyon

You need to go to the hospital. Burns like that, you're gonna get infected. Maybe even go to the brain.

I need my brain!

Wayne Lyon

Well, ya, hon, there was...you were abducted.

Dot Lyon

Stop saying that. I had a bad day. I needed some time to clear my head. Did I leave the house a mess? Well, shoot. I know you think I'm kinda this perfect woman, wife, mother, but you know, even I got a breaking point. Now, you want to set the table for breakfast? Gotta make sure Scott gets her vitamins and minerals for school. Most important meal of the day.

Indira Olmstead

But what I'm dealing with is the fact that the blood on your entry floor is different than the blood type we have on record for you.

Dot Lyon

Records? Those...y'know, I heard a man went into the hospital in St. Paul for a kidney transplant and he ended up with someone else's brain.

Wayne Lyon

No way!

Dot Lyon

Yah!

Witt Farr

It's good to see you again, Mrs. Lyon.

Dot Lyon

That...That's not accurate.

Witt Farr

Ah, well, first of all, I recognize you. And second, we pulled the security tape from the Gas N' Go, so it's clear you were there. And for the record, that's just reality.

Danish Graves

With all due respect, we've got our own reality.

Witt Farr

You can't...That's not a thing.

Dot Lyon

That's why I need her help. My Linda.

Saint Linda. That's what we call her.

Dot Lyon

Oh, you're serious.

Dot Lyon

Look, I think it's wonderful what you're doing here, this place you've made for suffering. But I don't need a a doll to say what's on my mind. Maybe I could have used one before Wayne and this new life, but I am in control now. I know who I am and what's important. So if there's any way that we can skip-

It's not gonna work, dear. You came here to confront me, the things you think I did, what happened after I was gone. This is the process. You wouldn't be here if you didn't need to be here.

Dot Lyon

I came for you. And to take you back to testify.

And what I'm saying is you need to testify first. Then we can decide if I should go or you should stay. Now eat your piccata.

Dot Lyon

You don't even have a plan, do you?

Roy Tillman

God has a plan.

Dot Lyon

And what is that?

Roy Tillman

Must be cold living out there in the dark, so let me spell it out for you: you made a promise. To Him, to me. You broke your vow.

Dot Lyon

You broke my fingers, my collarbone, three ribs. You dislocated my jaw.

Roy Tillman

I was trying to fix you.

Dot Lyon

Like a window cleaner pissing on a window.

Dot Lyon

Please, I can't be here. I'm Scotty's mother. She said ice cream cake for her birthday and I forgot to order it and there's a three day minimum. She just started a new school and the girls are being mean. There's Thanksgiving and Christmas. This is probably the last year she's gonna believe in Santa Claus. And I can't unsee it, her sitting on Santa's lap at the mall and he's asking her, "What do you want for Christmas little girl?" And she's saying, "I want my mommy back." It's not just me. What you're doing, you're doing to them, too. And we're getting kittens next year we decided, and who's gonna be there to teach Scotty how to take care of them? Plus, I am den mother for the Girl Scouts, and I raise money for the library.

Roy Tillman

Enough.

Dot Lyon

No! I'm in love. True love. With the most wonderful man. He's my best friend. We went ice skating on our first date. And if you ask him, Wayne will tell you, shepherd's pie is still his favorite food. We just started watching Call the Midwife and there's, like, 13 seasons of that show! So if...if I don't come home...who's gonna remind him to take a Lactaid when he eats cheese?

Roy Tillman

You made a vow.

Dot Lyon

I was a child.

Roy Tillman

Oh, please. You had your hair, you had your menses...

Dot Lyon

And you had a wife and a son, almost my age, which was 15.

Roy Tillman

I don't care. You made a mistake when you left me. That means everything after that is a mistake, too.

Dot Lyon

My daughter is not a mistake.

Roy Tillman

Fruit of the poison tree. That's a legal way of saying "Two wrongs don't make a right." You belong to me.

Dot Lyon

Do you know how crazy you sound? The way you see things, your mind. But you believe it's the world that's gone mad. I have to go.

Roy Tillman

I tell you what, Nadine. I'll promise you - hand to God - I'll promise to let you go just as soon as you beg me to let you stay and mean it.

Dot Lyon

You want a promise? I'll make you a promise: I'm gonna kill you.

Lorraine Lyon

[on phone] Honestly, what's the point of being a billionaire if I can't have somebody killed?

Indira Olmstead

[picking up her ringing phone] Olmstead.

Dot Lyon

Indira, it's me. It's Dorothy.

Indira Olmstead

[to Lorraine] It's Dorothy.

Lorraine Lyon

Bill, I'm gonna have to call you back. [Lorraine hangs up] Let me talk to her. [Lorraine takes Indira's phone] Dorothy?

Dot Lyon

What?

Lorraine Lyon

Where's Danish? Have you seen him?

Dot Lyon

Killed. Roy killed him.

Lorraine Lyon

What was he even doing there?

Dot Lyon

For me. He came to save me.

Lorraine Lyon

Are you safe?

Dot Lyon

For now, but like a fish on the floor.

Lorraine Lyon

Listen to me. An army's coming, I called in some favors. State and federal. You need to get somewhere safe. Hide.

Dot Lyon

Why?

Lorraine Lyon

What do you mean "why"?

Dot Lyon

Why help now?

Lorraine Lyon

Don't get maudlin.

Dot Lyon

I need to know.

Lorraine Lyon

Because this busybody made me.

Dot Lyon

Oh, please. Nobody can make you do anything. If I don't make it back-

Lorraine Lyon

Quiet now. No daughter of mine is going down on the one-yard line. So put your big girl pants on and fight, you hear me?

Dot Lyon

Thank you.

Indira Olmstead

Dorothy, don't get in the fight.

Gator Tillman

Nadine?

Dot Lyon

Gator...

Gator Tillman

Nadine. I'm sorry.

Dot Lyon

It's OK. It's over now.

Gator Tillman

Did you really see my mom?

Dot Lyon

No, hon. I thought I did, but she was just a beautiful angel in a dream.

Gator Tillman

Would you...come visit me in jail?

Dot Lyon

With cookies. You still like oatmeal raisin?