Lorne Malvo quotes from Fargo

I'm not afraid to admit it. Well, she's something else, that Jemma. Just between us girls, that body, is it... I mean... What's she like in the sack?

Lorne Malvo

Hellcat. It's the only word for it.

Shit. Yeah. Weezy's basically a Jew in the bedroom.

Lorne Malvo

Oh, you mean she wears a wig, makes you do it through a hole in the sheet, yeah.

No. No, no. She stopped putting it in her mouth soon as the ring went on her finger.

Lorne Malvo

Well, that's a national tragedy, Burt.

Oh, mick mike. I just keep pinching myself.

Lorne Malvo

Well, honey, you've earned it. It's like my mama always said, "boys, if you like the milk, buy the freakin' cow."

Oh, that's so sweet. Well, I am gonna stick my whole thumb up your ass later.

Lorne Malvo

Aces.

Lou Solverson

Had a case once, back in '79. I'd tell you the details, but it'd sound like I made 'em up. Madness, really.

Lorne Malvo

Bodies?

Lou Solverson

Yes, sir. One after another. Probably, if you stacked 'em high, could've climbed to the second floor. Now, I saw something that year I ain't ever seen, before or since. I'd call it animal. Except animals only kill for food. This was-- Sioux Falls. Ever been?

Lorne Malvo

Went to Sioux City once back in my scandalous days. But anyway, you didn't answer my question there.

Lou Solverson

Well, I'll tell you what. You, uh-- you leave me your number. I'll make sure Lester gets it next time he comes in.

Lorne Malvo

Well, that's a solid offer, friend, but like I said, I'm just passing through. Thanks for the pie and the coffee. Haven't had a piece of pie like that since the Garden of Eden.

Gus Grimly

I figured it out.

Lorne Malvo

Good for you.

Gus Grimly

Your riddle-- shades of green. I figured it out.

Lorne Malvo

[irritated] And?