[catches up with Gyro at the elevator; out of breath] Hey, Gyro Gearloose!
If this is about the Gearloose Magnetic Backpack, I specifically said they should not be used as school bags. Blathering Blatherskite, one teen gets stuck to a moving school bus. [starts pushing a button]
No, no, no, no, no. Louie Duck, Scrooge's super-rich nephew.
[releases the button with his finger and the elevator door opens] Keep talking, sir.
I can't believe Scrooge and that tired old board of his didn't see the potential in Lil' Bulb here. I'd love to invest, but I'm gonna need to test this little guy out first. Do you mind if I borrow him for the afternoon?
Anything you say, rich nephew. Lil' Bulb, you be good. Don't you rise up against your masters.
[annoyingly imitating Scrooge] "Put in a hard day's work. I think I'm so much smarter than--"
Louie! Where have you been? Trying to get out of work again?
What? No! I just, um... uh, filled up my notepad with all that precious business wisdom, so I went to go find another.
Good lad! Feel free to take as many pads as you want. [to the boardroom] Or are we not allowed to use those either, ya penny-pinching buzzards?! [slams door, but immediately opens again] No, but really, make sure to use the front and back of every page. [closes the door, but opens again] And write small.
You cannot get rid of the Bin. You may think they're crackpots and weirdos, but they're the ones who push innovation and creativity, and spur this company ever forward.
[the Lil' Bulb dime robot crashes into the room]
Just a little malfunction! Definitely not evil!
[the robot leaves]
Look, they're all mad as loons, and if you fire them, they're definitely going to seek revenge.
I don't understand. It should be here somewhere.
Wait, these books. They're all out of order. Quackfaster's a lot of things, but she's not sloppy.
QQuackfaster
[offscreen] Use your training. The most valuable knowledge must be earned.
Okay, how much of this is about us doing your work for you?
I'm proud of you, lad. You put in a full day at the office. I think you've earned this. [gives Louie his dime]
You're giving me your number-one dime?
Ha! That's not my lucky dime. I never let my dime out of my sight. [pulls out a necklace with the real dime in it] That was just a decoy. I'm not an idiot, this place is full of lunatics.
[double checking supplies in the boat] Compass. CB radio. Sunscreen.
Hot dog costumes! [puts life vests covered in hot dogs in the boat]
You know, in case we get lost at sea, and one of us, probably Louie, goes mad with hunger, we'll put these on. Louie hates hot dogs, so he probably won't eat us.
Are you saying that Louie would rather eat us than hot dogs?
That was actually pretty cool. Are you, like, in the circus?
Circus acrobats keep elephant hairs in their pockets for good luck. I don't know why I just told you that, or why I'm still talking, or why I pointed out the fact that I'm still talking, or-
[after Webby opens a gate]
[obviously very excited for the fist bump] Ohhhhh yeah! [bumps Lena's fist]
You wanna blow it up, don't you? [Webby nods] Psssh.
[Webby proceeds to do an exaggerated fist bump explosion]
Lena, this is Huey, Dewey, and Louie.
Webby, we've been looking for you everywhere!
Cute, with the names, and the color-coded outfits, is that, like, your thing? You're all exactly the same?
HDHuey, Dewey, & Louie
[in unison] Ha! No way! We're all unique snowflakes! [beat] Well this usually never happens. This is really weird! Okay, stop talking! [beat] Antidisestablishmentarianism! SERIOUSLY?! Gah!
Seriously, Webby, where have you been? We've been worried out of our minds!
Right, you were so worried that you left her on a beach and didn't show up for four hours?
Thanks to old Captain Lost!
Why would you put me in charge of the map again?! This is not on me.
[chanting] Captain Lost! Captain Lost!
[enraged] Ooh, you change the tone of that chant! [starts strangling Dewey as Huey tries pulling him away]
Yeah, they seem like a real tight crew.
[Episode starts with the Duck nephews, Webby, Lena, and Mrs. Beakley leaving the cinema after seeing a horror movie]
Oh, man, that is classic cinema!
Oh, and remember when the surgeon tried to cut the mole queen in half but then she multiplied into a million mole babies and then they ate him?! [imitates chainsaw noises and Webby makes growling sounds]
[grabs Lena by the arm] You said this was an educational film. Suitable for all ages.
Uh, it's a cautionary tale about the dangers of mole monsters. And everyone could use a lesson on chainsaw safety.
[Launchpad is the last person to leave the cinema with a horrified look on his face and looks at the movie poster]
Lame! Where was the drama, the heart, the needlessly expensive car crash mayhem?
Even if mole-men did exist, why attack someone in the shower? With the water running, there wouldn't be enough traction to attack anyone above the knee. Totally phony.
What is with you guys? It says right on the poster, "based on an actual true novel."
[pulls out his Junior Woodchuck Guidebook] This is the only book I trust. If it's not in the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook, then it's not a thing.
Well, what about the legendary Terra-firmians of Duckburg?
[sigh] Let's see... Pterodactyl, terror-dactyl, terrible twos, nope. No Terra-firmians. Must not exist.
[laughing] What? Terra-firmians, the mythical underground race that live below our very city?
Children, children. There's an easy way to settle this. Let's go find them ourselves.
[takes out and opens her diary] The Terra-firmians are an ancient race built of two warring tribes. The Terries and the Firmies. They were once united under a proud king. After the king's untimely death, an epic battle began over who would assume control. But one day, the rightful prince will reunite the two tribes and put an end to their bitter conflict.
Oh, just a drawing of a candy I wish they made. Webbi-dings.
Me as a superhero. Look, can we just focus on all the exciting stuff I just said?
